On Mental Health, Social Distancing Diaries

Pandemic Spotlight on My Mental Health Needs.

I’m sitting here at Mom’s, we’ve been trying to get her dog used to ours and it’s definitely going better but we decided nighttime still needed some calm and isolation so I’ve been staying at her place with her dog every night she’s in the hospital. It’s not so bad, as an introvert during quarantine I don’t have a lot of my required alone time so this has been guaranteeing me some at the end of every day.

I find my introverted need for alone time to recharge has become much more obvious to my family since the pandemic started. I tend to isolate myself in my bedroom at night with a book or my laptop or my bullet journal. Donnie will come in and see me watching something on my laptop and say, “You can watch that in the living room?” and I hate to say, “I NEED A BREAK FROM YOU GUYS!” so I usually just blame it on Wesley talking into the gaming headset being a distraction.

I’m not sure Donnie really needs alone time like I do. I mean, I guess he gets it on his runs so maybe he needs it and doesn’t realize it, but I always feel like it hurts his feelings when I demand solitude. Especially because in a lot of the cases he and I haven’t seen each other all day but I’ve been with the kids or my Mom and so I’ve still been around people and so I need a break from people not from him – but that’s hard for him to believe. I have found since virtual school started and I’m trying to serve the roll of lunch staff/handout printer/calendar reminder/tech support that I really need some alone time at the end of the day and it 100% has nothing to do with anyone in particular, I’m just…tired.

This is why I try to get some recharge time in parking lots where no one knows that’s what I’m doing and so no one takes it too personally.

So this time at Mom’s has given me a way to get alone time without anyone taking it personally. Although my family does miss me as I haven’t spent the night at home since Friday.

You should be careful while mixing Ativan with the drugs that have a depressing effect on the central nervous system and ethanol-containing drugs, because such combination of the drug scan lead to the development of aggressive ness, https://www.wcihs.org/buy-cheap-ativan/ psychomotor agitation and pathological intoxication. It should also be borne in mind that nicotine reduces the activity of Ativan.

I’ve become an avid TikTok watcher during the pandemic too and if you use TikTok, the algorithm is SO SMART and knows the new stuff to show you that is different from stuff you’ve liked but somehow TikTok knows you’ll like this new stuff too. Like…I’m on Forager TikTok now and I LOVE IT. There’s so much good stuff on Foraging TikTok! But I bring this up because Anxiety TikTok has some of the BEST videos of people describing some of the feelings I feel SO PERFECTLY and SO HILARIOUSLY that I just want to post them to my social media biographies everywhere and be like: Watch this TikTok. It’s me especially with the added anxieties revolving around expectations during the pandemic.

Here was one I found yesterday:

I downloaded this video to my phone in case I ever need to send it to someone as an explanation as to why I might have been weird when we did something new-to-me together. Especially because there is SO MUCH NEW during the pandemic that I’ve never done before and so I might not even being going someplace new but it’s new since the pandemic and so…SO MUCH COULD BE DIFFERENT! I AM SCARED!

I guess this is just the new normal at this point, huh?

3 thoughts on “Pandemic Spotlight on My Mental Health Needs.”

  1. Oh, this is so familiar. My husband gets very hurt that I don’t want to sit in the living room in the evenings and re-hash our days, but I just cannot sit and talk to another person sometimes. We are fortunate to have the space to be able to spread out, but that means he comes and finds me to talk to me, which isn’t really what I’m going for. I wish extroverts could get that it isn’t personal.

  2. Yeah… I can’t decide if I need/crave alone time or not because I am alone ALL the time and miss doing things with people. But I also know that if I have too many demands on my time, I feel overwhelmed and am relieved when it is just me.

    And that anxiety thing? Man. It’s exhausting. Remember when we were meeting at OBX for book club? I was so nervous… I scouted the parking situation ahead of time (RELIEF: normal parking right across the street in front of it), but was also worried about seating (chairs with arms are no bueno for my wide load). The high stools were a bit uncomfortable, but I could stomach it for the company. There is so much I don’t even attempt because of fear/anxiety at even being able to navigate or sit easily.

  3. I was in this study group for the Happiness Project once and we switched to different houses and one week it was at a girl’s house up on the Ledges and I panicked b/c that’s where rich people live and there’s a guard gate and I drive a beat up car with hippie stickers on the back and so I didn’t go and then never went back to any meeting again because I was embarrassed.

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