I recently heard someone discuss the metaphor of juggling too many balls that you’ll end up dropping one and kinda change it a little and saying that it’s okay to drop a ball…as long as it’s one of the rubber ones that will bounce and not the glass ones that will break.
And, as you can guess, I’ve been thinking about that a lot.
Now, first things first, every time I use the word “balls” I giggle. I can’t help it. So if you find yourself giggling at all while I’m talking about serious things, please don’t be fooled, I am too. I’m the one that had to call my cake balls, cake “poppers” just to keep from giggling too much when I offered to make them.
So I’ve been trying to think about which are the glass balls in my life, because I definitely drop a shit-ton of other balls and yeah…most of them are rubber. I am constantly forgetting to respond to emails and text messages because there is no part of my brain yet that has figured out how to catalog that stuff into “long term memory” when I see it when I’m standing in line at a grocery store, or in the middle of the night when I walk the dog. I just forget about it entirely, usually until I have to text/message that person in the future and then see the never-answered message.
But that’s a rubber ball, right? I mean, if it was a text/message about something at the Glass Ball level, they’d probably reach out again.
So my first thought was, I guess my family are my glass balls. Because honestly, they’re the most important thing in m life and the thing…especially lately…that I worry about the most.
But then I remembered something my Dad told me a long time ago, that you have to be careful about coming home from work or something stressed, and since you can’t take out your stress on the things that stresses you out for fear of losing your job/friendships/etc, you take it out on your family because you know they won’t/can’t leave you.
And y’all? Sometimes I do that. Which means I’m dropping the glass balls all the time. But…instead of like a glass ball…it’s like with my phone…they have a protective covering but that covering is not going to save it every time so every time I drop it I panic until I pick it up and flip it over and make sure the screen is not broken.
So I think in my life…I’m juggling rubber balls that bounce and can be picked back up to juggle more…but I’m also juggling a few cell phones which I really shouldn’t drop, but I do and so far none of them have broken.
And I’d like to be more careful with my cell phones. Especially right now when everyone is fighting special battles that I know are only temporarily but they need me to really be there for them right now more than ever, you know? And maybe it’s okay to risk it with the cell phone when I know I’m walking on a soft surface or in bed, but I don’t want to drop my phone on the rocks in the woods which is where we’re at now. With teenagers and a husband who carries too much stress and moving my Mom…I’m juggling all of these phones in situations where if they drop…their chances of breaking are more so I need to make sure I’m not doing that thing my Dad talked about….which is take my family for granted.
I’m in a *relatively* good mental place right now, it’s like the universe made me stronger at the perfect time to help everyone else on their journeys. I want to be cognizant of that and make good choices for everyone which I think is why I’ve been just letting go of more and more rubble balls lately. They’ll be there when I want to pick them back up again and they’ll be fine…but for now? I need to focus on the cell phones more.
Man. I totally beefed up that metaphor…but in a sense…that’s kinda on brand.