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Blergh.

Blergh.

I’m just staring at the blank screen today and feel overwhelmed by dueling sense of A) TOO MANY THINGS TO TALK ABOUT and simultaneously B) I HAVE NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT.

I contain multitudes.

I started my morning googling “In-Home Veterinary Euthanasia Huntsville, AL” so that should tell you how my day is going.

The sad thing is right now you’re all wondering, Yeah, but which pet? because BOTH of my pets are currently napping by the rainbow bridge.

It’s Sunflower, by the way. She’s stopped purring. She’s sleeping in more hidden places. She’s barely/not eating. And she has wasted away to just skin and bones. I think it’s time. But she hates the pet carrier and the car and I hate to torture her before Euthanizing her. Seems like we don’t have any in-home companies here but I’m going to call my vet when they open at 7am and ask them about it. Maybe one of the vets will just come to my house? Can they do that?

Blergh.

Anyway…I have so many thoughts about racism and Nazis and white fragility but this morning my mind is just focused on Sunflower and I can’t sort through that right now. So, my apologies for the depressing “Will someone come to my house and kill my cat?” entry I just wrote.

Also apologies for my dark humor. I’m tired. I’m sad. It’s all I got.

Love your animals today. I think it’s time to say goodbye to mine.

9 thoughts on “Blergh.”

  1. So sorry, Kim, among the toughest of decisions. I will remember “napping by the Rainbow Bridge” the next time any of my furry-four-footeds are there.

    Please try Doorstep DVM House Call Vet Clinic – Michele Ashman DVM. She cares for a number of my friends animals and has performed that final service for a number of them.

    Peace to you and your family. 🙁 <3

  2. Sending you a big hug, this is really difficult thing to do, say goodbye to a beloved companion. I’ve had to do it recently myself. Try to remember you gave her a good life and always did the best for her, even in this final act of kindness. And it is kindness because if she’s stopped purring, eating and is being lethargic in hidden places it’s time. Cats are very stoic. I hope you get a vet who will come to your house.

    P.s. I’ve been thinking of you as soon as I heard the recent news in America. Could you gain some comfort in the words that it might be really bad right now on order to get a whole lot better and build something new. Xxx

  3. Oh, Kim. I’m so sorry. When we had to say goodbye to Seamus, we had a vet come to the house, and it was absolutely the better way to go. I’ll be thinking of you today.

  4. I think dark humor is so important. Sometimes you just have to. I know there are vets who do in-home euthanasia. Hope you can find one in your area. Thinking of you and your furry babies.

  5. I saw on instagram that Sunflower has gone to the other side. My heart goes out to you; I’ve been there and it’s heartbreaking.
    As for what’s happening in our country…that’s a different kind of heartbreak. Pain comes in so many forms.
    I remember reading a book when I was a YA about there being two kinds of terrible — this must have been 35 years ago or so, and I just looked it up and it’s out of print. A boy breaks his arm and finds he will spend the upcoming and long-anticipated summer in a cast and it’s just the most terrible thing ever. (And of course that is understandably just how it really feels to a kid. No swimming, no sports, etc. A ruined summer.) But then his mother gets cancer and dies. A wholly different kind of terrible.
    And so it goes. Life is full of personal grief (Sunflower) and public anguish (Trump et al.) and they are weighted differently, perhaps, but they hurt us nonetheless and we must muddle through and see our way to the other side.
    But there is good in life too, of course! (Do I contradict myself? Very well then, I contradict myself.)
    (Many thanks for bringing that delicious quote to mind!)
    Hugs to you and yours.

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