Perspectives.

I actually returned from vacation Thursday evening which I hoped would give me Friday as a way to “ease” into the real world again before getting the full weekend to recover. Unfortunately, towards the end of my work day on Friday I started feeling sick and a mild-but-inconvenient illness kept me kinda useless all night Friday and a good chunk of Saturday. Then we were hosting Family Dinner on Sunday so I had to quickly get into “CLEAN THE HOUSE AND COOK THE DINNER MODE!” bringing me to this morning when I woke up thinking, Wait. What? Monday? Already? But I just got back from Colorado! I’m not ready yet!

Vacation hangovers are terrible. I mean, total First World problem, but still…TERRIBLE.

Also – a tree fell on our fence while we were out of town so I have to WALK my dog first thing in the morning now and I do not do well doing anything without my first 14 cups of coffee. Even walking the dog.

Oh. And let’s also discuss that when I woke at 3am (a time no human wants to be up if he/she has a choice) and went to get clothes out of my closet my husband – who I guess hadn’t been sleeping well all night – loudly grumped, “OH MY GOD. ARE YOU ALREADY UP? JEEZUS. I MIGHT AS WELL GET UP NOW. I’VE BEEN TOSSING AND TURNING ALL NIGHT BECAUSE I GUESS I HAVE FORGOTTEN HOW TO SLEEP.”

He did not get up, by the way. Which is probably good. My vacation hangover and my case of The Mondays and my irritation at having to walk my dog puts me in a mood I call: I HAVE NO PATIENCE WITH YOUR GRUMPS, MISTER.

I tell you all of this because I’m determined to try to take more control of my perspective. Yes! These are the things making me terribly grumpy this morning. I am very overwhelmed and tired and not quite ready for the real world yet. BUT. BUT! I also got to spend a lovely week with my Mom and my brother and his family in beautiful Breckenridge, CO and while the real world is a bit of a jolt, that was a trip of a lifetime. I’m so lucky to have been able to do it. The whole time I was thinking, Dad would love that we’re doing this. And he would have. That we are still close enough to plan trips together. That we do it involving the outdoors and adventures. That we were in a parade. (AND MADE THE LOCAL PAPER!) That I saw a moose. He would have loved all of that.

So I’m back to the grindstone today and I’m definitely overwhelmed with life but I’m trying to keep perspective. The world has been full of real tragedy and real pain that I’m seeing firsthand now thanks to the power of social media. There has always been real tragedy and real pain out in the ether, I just haven’t had to look at it every day like I do now.

Before social media I could choose not to watch the news, I didn’t have a lot of real world friends so unless the tragedy hit the few I talked to daily on the phone – I didn’t know of any of it. But now I do. I see fundraisers for kids with cancer and videos of unjust shootings. I see protests and marches and interviews with grieving widows. I see links to stories about houses being robbed or businesses burnt down. I see friends in the hospital and friends who have lost their children. Every day it’s right there on Facebook, as I’m checking it with everyone’s race results and Independence Day photos. It’s just speckled around the pictures of Red, White, and Blue parades and videos of cats jumping into bathtubs.

So I have a bit more perspective now, about my Case of the Mondays and my Vacation Hangover.

I’ll try to get back into the groove of life today so that I can wake up tomorrow with a little more rhythm and less grumpiness. I’m happy to be home, but I miss my family terribly, already.

Here’s to spreading joy today, in whatever way I can.