The Tears and the Rain

I’ve had a rough weekend, emotionally. I think 99% of the cause is the bad eating surrounding the holidays. I’ve got a lot more junk in my system than my body has been used to and I have seen evidence time and time again that junk food can cause gray feelings with as much dependability as a sleepless night or a rainy day. I got a little bit of a boost today playing in the rain with my friends on the trails, but then that was followed by an epic Wesley meltdown which involved hitting and punching and profession of hatred and all around bad behavior…even while I championed my textbook calm and collected response to demonstrate how you can deal with anger without punching.

I’m also sad because my oldest went back to school and I never feel like I got enough time with him and I’m not sure I made use of the time I did have as I spent some of it nagging him for not spending enough time with his family. That’s probably a shitty move, but I did it anyway.

It’s just not been a holiday weekend full of laughter and love and the majority of the cause is that I didn’t eat well and my body and my mind are so interconnected that when one is fueled poorly, the other suffers. Just like my body shuts down when my spirituality is not cared for. The Thanksgiving meal itself was nice, we had an epic CHristmas music dance party following, but I’ve felt pretty crappy the rest of the time.

Sorry for this depressing entry but I’m 2 days out of NaBloPoMo and I’m not going to fail now. In some weird way it’s better to blubber my gloom on the blog than to skip a day during NaBloPoMo all together.

4 thoughts on “The Tears and the Rain”

  1. I know W has meltdowns, but could this have been precipitated by brother leaving. Sometimes little ones don’t even know the triggers, but not having an older sibling there all the time could be one of them

  2. I can relate to the emotions especially this weekend. I love the holidays but I find my self in a funk here lately with bad food choices and just an overall feeling that what progress I made physically has gone south. Kind of bummed about that and this whole age thing which I know is ridiculous. Finally I find my self reminiscing a lot lately about my side of the family and how so many are not with us anymore.

  3. Cried as soon as my crew walked out the door today even though I know Christmas break is very soon. I think I miss mine more this year than his freshman year last year. I thought it was supposed to get better not worse?!

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