Did you tell you about the time how, a mere seconds after I left my children behind in their classrooms for the first day of school, I busted my ass in front of all of their friends? My first thought was Thank GOD this happened AFTER I dropped them off. I’m not positive who all saw me, it was actually in the drop off area in front of the school, but it was the First Day of School so there were ninety million people in cars and on foot in that area when I tripped. So I’m certain at least ONE person saw me that would have MORTIFIED my children. A crush, a teacher, an enemy…or all of the above!
But they were inside, safely isolated from their Mom’s klutziness.
Yesterday was Walk To School Day. We live less than a mile from school and it’s all downhill so walking to school on this day every year is a no-brainer. I decided to put my running stuff on and just go for my run after I left them at the school. So, I’m already a tiny bit of an embarrassment wearing spandex and a hydration pack, but they’re used to that from me so it wasn’t too bad.
But then, near the school I tripped on a pine cone and NEARLY hit the ground. I didn’t fall all the way, but the weird dance/recovery moves I had to do to KEEP from falling may have been more embarrassing than an actual fall. I cracked up immediately out of sheer embarrassment as the sidewalk (and road) was littered with people. Nikki did not laugh. She gave me a polite smile and then IMMEDIATELY surveyed who all was around us.
(She later told me she heard the boys behind us laughing at me. I told her that was the story of my life.)
THEN! We were crossing over a greenway and I was pointing out all of the mud where the water levels had been SO HIGH during the rain this week and AS SOON as I turned my head straight again I was met with a tree branch to the face. I screamed because A) It hurt and B) It scared the crap out of me. I thought someone was jumping out of the neighboring yards to attack me, evidently.
Of course I laughed even harder then and just apologized TERRIBLY for being the World’s Biggest Mess.
Wesley was entertained, Nikki was just shaking her head with the signs of an internal battle of Love v/s Shame.
Let’s face it. They need to get used to that crap. This is me we’re talking about. I’ve never been an example of grace our poise or even balance. It’s branches to the face or it’s nothing at all, kids. Get used to it.