Randomly

I’m Thankful For The Phrase “Me Too.”

When I turned off the comments here when newbies popped over and got a little too rough (My fave – the 14-page long comment that started “You are what’s wrong with this society…”. For the record? 90% of the stuff this person was yelling me at, I didn’t actually say or condone.) I was reminded why I love it here. Here on my blog. It’s because it’s my safe place. I know you guys, and I feel like you know me. None of you would ever read my words and hear me say, “Consumerism is what makes this country the wonderful place it is!”

There have been so many times in the last 10 years since I started this blog…that I have felt alone. A lot of those times were very serious alone times. When I started having miscarriages. When I had to put my dogs to sleep. When I lost my Dad. When I lost my job. When I sent my child off to college. When I had another child repeatedly kicking me and punching me and spitting in my face. All of these times I came here to unload. To dump my sadness and my frustrations and my anger into this place and leave it for you to comb through. And every. single. time. you came back with a resounding, “Me too.”

There’s something about knowing that someone else has been where you are, and has come out on the other side, that is so uplifting. Or – hell – even if they’re still wading in the trenches. Even that is uplifting. Knowing that you are not actually alone. Someone has felt the things you’re feeling, makes it feel a tad bit more survivable. And it made me feel a tad bit less crazy for feeling those things. When I was in the midst of my reproductive nightmare and found myself battling irrational anger over the pregnancies around me: You made me feel less evil. When I wouldn’t take my Dad’s super-ugly watch off for an entire year after he died: You made me feel less pitiful. When I crumbled in heartache sending my oldest child and one of my best friends off to college: You made me feel less insane.

This space? Has been my refuge. The place where I can come and tell you what I’m feeling and so many of you kindly wrap your arms around me and say, “I’ve been where you are…you will survive. I promise.” And those words, those virtual hugs, they have kept me from falling into the darkness time and time again.

And then there’s the silly things. The infatuation with Harry Potter. The addiction to writing utensils. The love of fiction written for those people 20 years younger. The weakness for sparkly Vampires. The geeky loves and the nerdy treasures. You have echoed your love for all of the things I thought made me a lone weirdo out in the universe. And those moments are just as important as the moments you’ve lifted me out of sadness. Because having people to share joy with is just as important as having people to love you when you feel unlovable.

So…on this Thanksgiving Day (when no one will even be online to read this) I want to thank YOU…my blog friends. Thank you for all of the “Me too!”s you’ve given me over the last decade. Thank you for making me feel less alone, less sad, less dorky. Writing here has rarely ever been a chore because it’s just like a phone call to friends. Or maybe more like time on the couch in my therapist’s office. Either way – Thank you. For everything.

18 thoughts on “I’m Thankful For The Phrase “Me Too.””

  1. I was online to read this! I have to work today, so I will be spending the day in our NICU with the babies and their families (and my awesome coworkers). Anyway, so much of what you have said during the many years that I have been reading your blog has resonated with me, even though our lives are REALLY different. I am thankful for all those times that I was able to say “Me too” when reading your words because it reminded me that I was not alone in my thoughts and my feelings, and that there are people out there who understand.

    Oh, and the pens. You have TOTALLY introduced me to some AWESOME new pens! So thanks for that as well!

  2. Aly – I am 26, married, with dog. I am an attorney, but currently only in Maryland--where I do not live anymore. I am working on the whole getting licensed in NYS (hello, bar exam) and finding a job. While keeping sane.
    Aly says:

    Thank you for always writing and letting us in!!! I also always appreciate your optimism and absolute love of the things/people around you. Happy thanksgiving!!

  3. I’m online! Reading a bit, trying to get the motivation to go chop a mountain of veggies.

    Happy Thanksgiving, Kim. Thank you for your always entertaining writing, for not being afraid to share your perspective (a great thing, because you have a real knack for presenting things in a gentle, relatable way), and for listening to my email freakouts about random things from running to religion. <3

  4. I am online reading this, too. Thank you for always writing such uplifting things and for sharing your pain and your happiness and your love of Harry Potter and YA lit and all the rest of it! I think you are what is RIGHT with our society! You always do your best to put positive energy out there, and that has reminded me to do the same. I don’t always succeed by a long shot. But I think you are great and I appreciate you!

  5. Weirdos have to stick together after all 🙂 I’m not a runner, but I share your passion for many other nerdy joys!

  6. I’m online at work today too 🙂 I want to say thank you for motivating me to start running. You inspired me to sign up for my first half marathon and I’ve run 3 more since that one. I never would have had the guts to try it if hadn’t have been for your encouragement, even though we’ve never met!

  7. peskyblackfly – Before I was a Tortoise, and a Tedd, or a Tomato, I was somebody's Pesky Black Fly. I'm still Pesky you better believe it!!
    Tamara says:

    I’m from up North (yay Canada) so no day off for me today..boo! Thanks for writing here so that I can start this day the same as all the others- with your AWESOMENESS.
    You’ve been a real (cyber) inspiration for me- with the running (almost 3 years now for me), the tips (I heart my fitbit) and the other cool things (Bullet Journal 2014 here I come!)
    THANK YOU KIM for sharing yourself with all of us – the happy, the sad, the tough stuff, the rad stuff, the nerdy and the nifty. You’re all in, all the time (without crossing any lines of privacy etc) and I love ya for it!
    Have a happy day with your family today- and I hope you get to talk to E a bit since he can’t be there

  8. Thanks for writing today! Congrats on your chilly run too. I’ve been reading for a long time and never comment. Just wanted to let you know that I’m thankful for your writing and sharing as much as you do. Happy Thanksgiving!

  9. I appreciate and envy you your ability to come here and lay it all out. For all of the ways we are alike, there are many others in which we aren’t and in which I find myself feeling that alone feeling. I do not have the balls to air it online, though. (Heh, I said “balls.”)

    Happy Thanksgiving, Kim. Hope you have a wonderful day.

  10. I am Thankful for your blog too! I love reading about you and your family, it’s always nice to catch up with old friends!

  11. Thank you and have a great Thanksgiving! I know it’s a lot to do, but I love that you are posting every day in November. I’m struggling with my running and love your running posts. Thank you again!

  12. Aw, thanks. So sweet. I’m thankful for your blog, which I have read so long I don’t remember ever not reading it. Love and hugs!

  13. Thank you for always keeping it real! I wish more people would just admit when they are struggling. You always make me feel like I’m not alone.

    Also, love your continuing running story. It keeps me motivated and I always wait impatiently for your race updates. 🙂

    Unrelated: how are you feeling since your surgery? I hope it helped.

  14. Me too. 🙂 I read all the time, but rarely ever comment. And I don’t blog much either. But so often you are writing about things that I too feel, or have felt, and you articulate it so well. Pens, TV, children, parenting, food, running (someday I want to be a runner), human rights, Knoxville (my mom grew up there), reproductive issues, etc. When I am feeling isolated and home alone, the words that you (and other bloggers) write on the screen keep me company. So thank you.
    And my spouse ended up working on Thanksgiving too, so I was home alone.

  15. Plus, I never comment because 1) I’m on my phone and I have no brain and 2) I don’t usually think I have much to say that is valuable. Thanks for the reminder that saying “me too” is valuable enough.

  16. I’m so grateful for you too, Kim. Love your stories and your written opinion pieces and your beautiful family. Thank you for sharing it all!

  17. I know I am way late in posting, but my readership (is that a word?) fell off the last week while I was traveling and introducing my fiance to my family! Good excuse, right? But it’s nice to have all the NaBloPoMo entries to come back to and read. I have so many little things to say – like GEAUX NikkiZ and Wes! Awesome job on the 10k and 5k! And I really appreciated your post about Thanksgiving shopping, by the way. But this, this is why I keep coming back. I dunno when I started reading, longer than NikkiZ has been alive, and I just wish you guys all the joy and happiness in the world, and thanks for sharing your lives with us.

  18. Hannie – Hey, i'm Hannah, Born and bred in Bedford, UK. I'm foster Mum to a teenage boy and mum to a small boy. I'm married to Chris and blog about our life as a crazy slightly random family.
    Hannah says:

    If it makes you feel better I do go shopping on Thanksgiving…..oh yeah that’s because I live in the UK……..(okay funnier in my head!)

    As you say there are some businesses that do open on Thanksgiving. Here the rules are slightly different and although businesses are allowed to open on Sundays they close on Easter Sunday and Christmas Day – apart from some restaurants and places like that, but I tell you what, having grown up in a family who always did Christmas at home just the four of us, to actually go out for a Christmas dinner was really strange and seemed to take away some of the Christmas-ness – I’m so glad to be back on Christmases at home.

    It’s your blog, and freedom of speech puts it that you can write what you like, okay sometimes people might take offence and things like that but I think that’s a risk you sometimes have to take to speak your mind. I have three posts currently queued in my drafts because I need to think over if it’s right to post them or not and when to post them. Talk about a dilemma! Anyway I hope the meanies didn’t get you down too much, dftba

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