Not MY future, Jeezus. No way in HELL would I be ready for that for at least 20 years. If ever!
No…I think my husband is signing up for an Ironman. It was a tiny thought in the back of his head when we were hearing cities that may be added to the list. But then yesterday? We heard it was Chattanooga and it was basically a no-brainer. Ironmans are expensive races, so it’s not a decision we make lightly, but if we had to choose the perfect city? It would be Chattanooga. Donnie has done two Olympic distance triathlons there before and the races are very well organized and the city is super-accommodating.
I don’t know how updated I’ve kept this blog, but Donnie has been kicking total ass this triathlon season. He started in the winter to try to get his body into “Racing Shape”. He became leaner and meaner and has been working his ass off as a coach and as a Fleet Feet Racing team member this year. He’s placed in the top 3 of his age-group in all of the races he has finished. He got First Place in the one we did together. He’s doing 30-mile fast bike rides like it’s a cake walk and finally broke the 20-minute barrier on his 5K.
It’s hard, being married to someone so awesome. That sounds like I’m being cute, but I’m not. It really is hard. He’s lost weight he didn’t necessarily need to lose, he’s getting faster and stronger when he was already fast and strong to begin with.
And I’m super-excited for him to embark on this Ironman Journey because he has worked so hard to get here and that’s really the last step he has to make. And I need to get my own baggage cleaned out because I need to step up my A-game as wife and get over feeling insecure around my badass husband.
I need to figure out how to be INSPIRED by his awesomeness and not let my insecurities make me bitter about his success.
What about you? Are you married to a badass who unintentionally makes you feel kinda’ shitty about yourself? How do you deal with it?
When I heard this announcement the other day (yesterday?), my first thought was if your husband would be signing up for this. If he does, it would be great to hear how the training goes for him. I’m going to do my first Ironman in 2014 – eek!
So, I am not exactly in the same position, but I have a lot of challenges where I end up comparing myself, physically, to other people. And for various reasons, I’m usually lagging behind the rest, and this is one of the main reasons I haven’t yet joined a running group (one, I don’t know if I can do it because of my physical restrictions and two, I don’t want to make it easier for myself to compare myself to others and bring myself down)
So, when I start to compare myself, I try and turn my mind away from doing it and moving it into more productive ways of thinking: for example, how would I like to reach my next achievement? or what am I already doing to make those achievements? And, look at how much I have achieved already!
To be really pop-cultural reference-y: You do you. You do what you can do, in your own time and in your way, and you deserve not to have your own (MANY, GREAT) achievements lessened by comparing them to someone else. And someone else deserves to have their own achievements as well, without having it bring someone else down.
No idea if any of this will help, but maybe you’ll find a nugget that will lead you in the direction that works for you.
My husband is one of those rare birds who has always known what he wanted to do, went through the perfect uni program for that, landed a great job immediately following, and has been kicking ass and taking names in his career ever since.
I took a long-ass-long-time to figure out what I wanted to be when I grew up. I am still doing ok, but not particularly well career-wise. I am often intensely jealous, and feel kinda crappy about my own meagre achievements next to that.
I know he appreciates everything I do for us and our family that means he can keep kicking ass and taking names (including moving halfway around the world with him), and that he would support me in anything I wanted to do, and if I had the same passion and drive for something in my life.
Sometimes reminding myself of that helps. Kindof. Maybe.
(tl;dr? I totally feel you on this one)
Yeah, I’ve put on at least 15 stress pounds in the last year/18 months and my badass Army guy unintentionally makes me feel bad. And he’s totally trying to be supportive and wonderful and I end up grumpity and snapping at him because of my own insecurities. Poor guy. But he is hott, so there’s that. I’m with you in trying to let it turn into a positive motivation for me, and so I can just happily cheer and support him when he hits his big milestones, but it’s hard not to compare sometimes even if it IS unfair.
I have a similar thing going at the moment. My naturally skinny boyfriend and I are doing a 30-day Ab Challenge, and despite the fact that I *know* we are doing the same amount of exercise, you can already see the results on his stupid flat stomach. Not so much on mine.
I think it is just mind over matter, I keep reminding myself to be happy for him, and also that I am just as awesome.