(I was going to title this blog entry “Funk” but then a certain song popped into my head and I wanted to make sure you were hearing the same thing I was.)
So…there’s a lot of stressers in my life right now. Stressers? Stressors? Stressars? Firefox has no suggestions and I’m too lazy to see whether or not I just made up a word. STRESSERS. It’s a word for now, okay?
There’s my Mom who is still in the hospital in Knoxville post-surgery. They removed the malignant tumor but had to take more than just a bit of her colon as it had grown outside the colon and into her bladder and reproductive organs. No biggie…just a longer recovery. But we still haven’t gotten the pathology back from the biopsies and tumor so we’re still waiting on any future treatment information. Waiting for pathology reports is the most annoying thing about medical situations because they always hold that vital information that will change the outlook of your immediate future. YET THEY TAKE FOREVER. Don’t let the medical dramas fool you, there is no magic room down the hall that allows you to immediately look at test results. Just like there’s probably no real CSI unit that can get DNA results back in four minutes.
There’s LilGirl, our alpha bitch in the family who has always had some cataracts in her eyes but now has one eyeball that is swollen because they think the cataract has caused glaucoma. She has to be taken to Birmingham today to see a specialist. MrZ has one day off between switching jobs (Look! Another stresser!) and he’ll be using it taking her on a road trip. She’s an old dog so I’m not sure what the options will be for her but she’s been going blind for awhile and is very pitiful now that she’s in pain. Last night she was scratching at the wall in the hallway trying to get into our bedroom. SO SAD.
Then there’s my damn allergies. While Knoxville definitely makes them worse, they are not easy to deal with here at home. Alavert does me okay for most of the day but, like last night, it seems to wear off a bit while I sleep. Damn you and your 18-hour effectiveness! I was up since about midnight sneezing. I’d show you the pile of tissues I accumulated by the couch but that might be gross. My eyes do better with eyedrops but I still have huge bags under them partnered with dark circles. My nose skin is raw and my throat is constantly tickled. Allergies and allergy medicines keep me in a fog anyway, add lack of sleep to all of that and I’m bound to be a huge MESS today.
In case you were wondering…those three paragraphs were me trying to gain a bit of sympathy from the interwebs because I am in SUCH A FUNK. I’m just down and grumpy and sad and tired and angry and frustrated and every other negative emotion you can think of. I’m trying my best to force some sun into my outlook as that has been part of my attempt handling my own anxiety: THINK POSITIVE. I feel like I’m doing better with that mentality, it kept me sane at the dealership yesterday when I was stuck with AndyZ for 2.5 hours. I actually handled that situation well considering a few months ago I would have lost it the second I realized they had NO changing table in the bathroom. (This place is BRAND NEW and NO ONE thought of that?) So…I did okay yesterday during a high-stress period of time. But in general? I’m just having trouble ditching the funk. I have met so many people who fight way grander stressers than mine with positive outlooks, and I would love to be like them someday. But obviously – by the gray cloud in my heart today? I’m not there yet.
So…I’m going to include a cute little video MrZ took of AndyZ the other night doing his version of a Jumping Jack. Every time I watch this I smile. I hope you do to.
I hate HATE when I feel like this, like everything is collapsing around me! Just hang in there and watch that adorable video fifteen hundred times. Time will pass, some of the stressers will pass too, and hopefully you’ll feel like you can breathe again…
From one allergy sufferer to another – call your doctor. I’m not familiar with Alavaert, but every other antihistamine I’ve used can be used in greater or more frequent dosages than the OTC approved amount. Or, like my mother, you may need to add a benadryl (or other short term antihistamine) on top of the long-lasting stuff. Point being, there are options for more relief and your doctor can help with that. Oh, and the allergy misery has everything to do with that funk. Feel better soon!
I’m sorry things are so icky. I hope it gets better for you soon!
I’m sorry you’re feeling so crappy. I feel you on the allergies, nothing I take helps. I hope you get the pathology report soon, you’re right about the waiting time, if this was an episode of House you would have
had the results minutes after surgery. If only real life
was like that. Keep your chin up sweety, you’re dealing with a lot of things right now and it’s perfectly normal to be feeling low. Big hugs coming your way.
It’s “stressors”, but who cares…
AndyZ is cute. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.
I hope you can de-funk soon! Life is no fun with 2 gazillion things going on – especially when they are not so good.
It is ok… I actually went out for drinks and dinner with the girls last night and just ended up crying the ENTIRE time… So I get it… 🙂 Love you!!
Yeah, I’m an anxiety ridden person, so I totally hear you.
Let’s see, when I’m at my worst, I try:
-To get a night off and go out of the house alone.
-To get out of the house with the kids and do something special. While it causes me stress to plan it while I’m already feeling anxious, it always helps.
-To declutter something or somehow be productive while I’m taking care of the kids. 15 mins at a time, and I can feel the difference.
-To take a few mins to exercise, especially with a fun Wii game.
-To take a moment to think of what is actually stressing me the worst, and what I can do about it. (I tend to stop thinking when I’m anxious, so I forget the self analysis steps.)
Also, when I’m anxious about other things, I tend to not notice the straw that broke the camel’s back. It’s like the whole frog in a boiling pot scenario. If it jumped in while boiling, it’d get out fast. If you start it in cool water, it stays in and doesn’t notice the heat until it’s too late. I’d guess the allergies are like that for you. If everything else wasn’t happening, you’d be fixing the allergy situation fast. Now, it’s just another stressor you aren’t sure how to control. But if you do, you’ll feel tons better.
2nd the option of checking in with your health care provider re allergy meds. Until then – try taking the 24 hr stuff at night. This works for me – I was waking up like you are, and my throat would itch, and I couldn’t sleep, and bah. Misery. Instead, I take my Zyrtec at night (bedtime, which for me is 9:30ish) and then I’m pretty good all day. The horrific-meds-wearing-off-time is then late afternoon/early evening, which is actually a *better* time, pollen-wise, than the early morning. You should probably ask your hcp about a nasal steroid spray, too – made all the difference for me last year, until…I got nosebleeds. But! You might not! And it can really help with the godawful dripping and itching. The throat itching. Have I mentioned how much I hate that?
Can you also tell that I have had horrific allergies my entire life?
And I’m sorry about waiting for the path report on your mom. 🙁 Waiting is the hardest part – particularly when it determines subsequent actions. This may be TMI/jumping the gun/lots of assvice – but if she wound up with an ostomy (not sure how much colon they took, and sometimes it’s a stop gap measure if they have difficulty with the surgery) make sure she a) gets to see an ostomy nurse (they’re certified in this stuff) and b) gets some support from other people with ostomies.
I will now stop giving advice, I promise. I’m sorry things suck right now.
OMG, so cute! (AndyZ, not the stressers!)
Hope you feel better soon. I’d try to offer up some encouraging words, but you’ve got them already. Some things just have to work their way out of your system and/or psyche, I guess.
Sorry to hear about your mom. My MIL was diagnosed with colon cancer last November. After spending three weeks in the hospital, including surgery to install a temporary colostomy bag she came home to our house and has been living in our living room ever since. We (hubbby & I) have learned how to provide “unskilled” nursing care including how to change the ostomy bag. After a month-long round of chemo & radiation (which shrunk the tumor – yay!) and recovery time, she had surgery on April 7th to remove the tumor but unfortunately due to more damange than the doctors anticipated, they had to do a full hysterectomy (unexpected) and a permanent colostomy (also unexpected – boo!). After a couple more minor medical bumps in the road which stretched her hospital stay to two weeks, she is now back in my living room. We are hoping to get her back into her house soon, but with another round of chemo to go, those plans could change. If you want someone to commiserate with, I’m here.
(((HUGS))) I hope things turn out ok for your Mom. This has been a rough year for you. You’re allowed to be in a funk. Know we’re ALL here for you!
My desktop looks like a pharmacy right now. I take Claritin, Flonase, and Pataday eye drops everyday during spring. There is no way I could get thru the day without all of it. I agree with the others–contact your doctor and see if they can get you a nose spray and allergy eye drops.
I’m sorry you have so many stressors, dear 🙁 That just sucks.
Curious, did you say anything to the dealership about their lack of change table? I would like to hope it’s just an oversight instead of a deliberate, nahhh we don’t need that.
Zoot! It could be possible that you are in a post musical funk….I used get so “funky” after that week of crazy performance schedule…I mean if you really want to blame something 😉
I hope you feel better soon! I hope your mom’s path reports come back swiftly and she has a speedy recovery.
Thanks for the DNA line – that’s my line of work, and I laughed out loud… so even under stress you make someone else smile…
Hope it gets better soon! If you can carve out an hour, try watching Glee again now that you have the post-musical perspective…. it might help.
A. Did you try zyrtec or clairitin? They are all different and some work for some people and not others.
B. Have you seen an allergist? Allegra and Flonase/Nasonex are also awesome.
I’m starting allergy shots this summer so I will not have to feel the affects of allergies ever again!!
Puffs with lotion. Seriously. A nose-saver.
DAMN girl.. I needed that video. Watched it like five times, not gonna lie. I’m in Funkytown over here too. Hugs to you.
MUAH! Feel better sweet girl.
Waiting for the path report sucks. I was in the same situation almost exactly a year ago – they’d found a tumor in my mom’s colon, and we were waiting to find out how bad the infiltration was. (The story gets scary, but it has a really happy ending) She was eventually diagnosed with stage IV cancer with mets in glands, lymphs, liver and lungs. 6-12 month prognosis. We were devastated. Just under a year later, she has a clean scan, and a clean bill of health. She has an ostomy bag, and she reckons it’s improved her life dramatically. So even the worst possible news, doesn’t mean the worst possible outcome. Stay positive.
AndyZ’s jumping jack is ADORABLE!!!
Put a light coating of A&D ointment on the raw part (outside) of your nose at night and it will be much better in the morning. I learned this when the skin on my nose had started to crack and bleed–A&D ointment magically healed it overnight. I’ve even put A&D on my lips at bedtime when they got too painfully chapped and cracked to bear. Gross, but it worked.
Commenter #8 is right about taking your allergy meds before bed rather than in the morning. I was waking up very queasy from sinus drip every day and my doctor told me to switch Zyrtec to bedtime. It made a huge difference. If allergy meds tend to make you sleepy, taking them at bedtime is a good idea.
You might try an OTC saline nasal spray like Ocean (WalMart has its own cheap generic version). I recently needed to irrigate my sinuses, which is something I have an awful time doing. I actually read the label of the generic saline spray and learned that turning the bottle upside-down would make it dispense drops. With my head tilted back, I got a couple of drops into each nostril several times a day. This enabled all that nasty stuff to come out instead of accumulating and dripping slowly down my throat.
Gargling with warm salt water (1 tsp. salt in 6 oz. water) may help the tickle in your throat. It will definitely help a sore throat.
Consider that you may need something other than Alavert, which has the same active ingredient as Claritin if I remember correctly. Costco has its own version of Zyrtec which is dirt cheap and works just as well. You may need (prescription) Allegra, Allegra-D, Zyrtec-D, Singulair, and/or a nasal spray like Flonase or Nasonex. It’s well worth the money to be able to sleep through the night again. I speak from experience.
I so love your kids… so cute.
I’m sorry you’re feeling in such a funk. I’m thinking of you and praying for your mom. I can’t imagine how hard it must be. Just keep smiling and fighting and pulling through, and keep those beautiful kids close. They’re always good for a laugh.