I’d like to say I haven’t written because I’ve been busying partying or traveling or creating. Unfortunately, I’ve simply not had much to say other than, “I’m tired.”
I told MrZ yesterday that I’ve never been this tired in my entire life. I think he just blew it off because I talk about my exhaustion level 30 times a day, but I meant it. I’m so tired. I’ve not been able to take naps with NikkiZ for about 3 weeks now because AndyZ likes that time to be his awake time. Even before that, however, my naps were barely an hour if I was lucky. She only sleeps for about an hour-and-a-half, and it would take me at least 30 minutes to fall asleep.
Regardless of how short the naps were – I totally miss them. Terribly.
I’m up most nights watching TV trying to wind down until about 10pm. On average. Some nights I’m able to crash earlier, but most nights I’m up. It’s weird because I’m totally beat, but I’m still having a tough time falling asleep. And then, most mornings I’m up by 6am. AndyZ is still waking up every two hours to eat and for the last week he’s been waking up between feedings just to cry and fuss. Today I’m going to try eliminating all dairy (but my morning yogurt, I’ve eaten that for breakfast every day of his life so I don’t think that bothers him) to see if he sleeps better tonight.
I figure – on a good night – I’m getting 6 hours sleep. But most nights? Between 4 and 5. The most I ever get straight is about 2.5. Which, for one or two nights is not a big deal. But – I’ve been on this schedule for 8 weeks now and I’m losing my mind. Hence – not blogging. Every entry would look like this one: Oh Look! I’m Tired And Crazy! Still!
My Mom is coming in town today. She has offered to give me opportunities to sleep, but I’m not sure how easy it will be to sleep when I could be visiting with her. I’m not sure if I’d be able to go to sleep knowing she was out in the living room hanging out with the kids. But, I might at least try. Either that or spend the whole week crying in the fetal position in the corner.