You know. I’m trying NOT to get depressed about being unemployed. I really am. I’m trying to just focus on freelancing and setting up some money-making sites. I’m trying not to look at myself as a failure, but more so as someone who just opted for a change of course in her professional life. On her own. She did not get laid off. Nope. She just opted to be unemployed so she could work for herself.
But I’m depressed. And today? The Universe is not helping. My cell phone is getting ZERO reception anywhere around my home. (Usually it just stops working in my bedroom.) My internet (which I kinda need to make a living) has been spotty at best. I’m writing this at 12pm Central time. Let’s take bets on when (and if) it ever gets published. My stomach has been all upset, probably because I ate some weird frozen microwaveable meal that has been in the fridge since 2002. I tried to go for a walk this morning to boost my spirits but almost got run over by a roofing truck and then had to dodge the Chem Lawn truck as he treated so many lawns on our street that at one point I had to walk down the middle of the road to keep Sweetie away from the toxic chemicals. I locked my keys in my car so I couldn’t go to the bank because I couldn’t find the spare set which I found 30 minutes ago – IN THE KEY BOWL. I swear they weren’t there before. I can’t call or email anyone about my onset of bad luck because I’m isolated from the outside world with no phone or internet. I’ve got a conference call I’m supposed to be a part of in less than two hours, and who even knows if that will happen. Not like I could let anyone know that I’m currently here fighting the universe, unless they can interpret smoke signals.
Oh yeah – and I’m unemployed.
I’m trying my best to stay upbeat and optimistic. I really am. I’m trying to find the silver lining. Make lemonade. Get the best out of a bad situation. But today? It just seems hard. Like I’m walking uphill, in a snowstorm, wearing nothing but flip flops and a bathing suit. Completely unprepared and making no damn progress whatsoever.
I need a hug.