Marriage

Counting down the days…

MrZ has this thing he does that I’ve heard is a thing other men do to their female counterparts as well. (Dirty!) He makes me carry his wallet and keys in my purse if we’re going somewhere that may require walking. First? His keys are bulky and he hates them pulling down his pants and his wallet doesn’t fit right into the pockets of all of his pants. So, they all end up in my tiny purse that is already full of my own crap, dammit!

But – BUT – I noticed something the other day. And once I noticed it with one couple, I’ve noticed it with several others and I’m realizing, maybe this is a trend that I can one day hope to be a part of.

I’ve started noticing that with an older couple, sometimes the men are carrying the (quite large) handbags of their female counterparts. I’ve noticed it mostly at the mall with the senior citizen mall-walkers, but I also saw it out at Target last night and the woman could have put her purse in the buggy, but her husband was still carrying her purse under his arm.

WHEN DOES THIS START HAPPENING?

Or, I guess, how many years of marriage do we have to have under our belts before I can ask him to carry my purse? I mean – this is something I’m really looking forward to. Especially if I could start buying some really obnoxious, bright, and patterned purse. MrZ looks really cute in hot pink polka-dots.

41 thoughts on “Counting down the days…”

  1. Or, I guess, how many years of marriage do we have to have under our belts before I can ask him to carry my purse?

    I don’t remember one time where my dad “held the purse.” Maybe that’s one of the reasons my folks divorced. 😉

  2. My husband makes me carry his stuff too, particularly if we’re going on public transport, when I not only have to fit his keys and wallet into my handbag, but also a magazine *rolls eyes*. I think hell might freeze over before he would ever carry my handbag though.

  3. My hubby does this too!!! Drives me nuts. Of course I carry the HUGE diaper bag so I guess he figures his crap won’t weigh me down!

    BTW, I love your purse!!!

  4. Ours goes both ways… sometimes I put his stuff in my purse, sometimes he holds my purse (doesn’t ever really CARRY it), and sometimes I’ll refuse to carry one and he’ll put my id, lipgloss, etc in his pockets. I can’t wait to see if he carries our diaper bag… its bright pink paisley! Since AndyZ is on his way, maybe you can get a fun diaper bag and make him carry EVERYTHING because YOU have the baby. >grin<

  5. My husband won’t carry my purse but he will carry the diaper bag with my wallet, keys and cell in it if I am carrying the baby. Since I seldom carry a purse and a diaper bag it has seriously cut down on the number of times he has asked me to hold his keys and his wallet. My stuff and the baby stuff barely fit in the diaper bag so it works out nicely. The trick is to have a semi-masculine diaper bag. This is the one I use http://www.target.com/Eddie-Bauer-Diaper-Bag-Forest/dp/B000LEC8VY/sr=1-4/qid=1199628547/ref=sr_1_4/602-7546690-9087833?ie=UTF8&index=target&rh=k%3Aeddie%20bauer%20diaper&page=1 .

  6. Maybe I shouldn’t tell this, but my dad has carried a “man purse” for years. It’s a small rectangular leather thing with different compartments.

    When he was still working, it was very inconspicuous with his briefcase. Now, it’s not as inconspicuous. We are all used to it, but I guess it probably looks a little funny to everyone else.

  7. Very early in our relationship my husband handed his keys to me to carry. I refused to take them with the explanation that I knew we’d be walking and had streamlined the contents of my bag so that it wouldn’t be heavy, and that I expected he’d carry his own stuff. That was *years* ago. He’s never asked me again:-) On the other hand, I don’t expect him to hold/carry my purse.

  8. My husband took my purse once while we were shopping when my hands were full. I know he was trying to be nice, but I snatched it away from him and said “um, NO. I will never ask you to carry my purse. You are NOT going to be one of those guys!”. 🙂

    I like my men to have balls. Wait. Can I say that here? Delete this if not. heh heh

  9. Steve does that and lately I have foud it more annoying than usual. I am usually carrying Scout (and Penelope) and my purse with all of Scout’s crap in it …then he adds his crap. He needs his own damn purse if you ask me!

  10. I asked my husband to hold mine a week or so ago while in line for Santa – you’d have thought I was plucking his toenails off.

  11. My husband doesn’t ask me to hold his wallet. I guess that’s one annoying thing he doesn’t do. He did, however, put two dirty glasses into the perfectly clean sink last night instead of putting them in the dishwasher. So, if it’s not one thing, it’s another!
    I hope the purse carrying thing is a learned behavior, just slowly start conditioning him to it!

  12. strongerthandirt – I am a high school mathematics teacher turned into stay-at-home-mom. My kids are 1, 3, and 3 (for now). I don't always have something interesting to say, but I usually have a picture (or 10) of my kids to show you.
    elena says:

    I really love that purse. I brought up the link and my husband said “that’s a man purse.” Mr. Z has my husband’s approval for carrying your purse. I’m sure that is all he is waiting for, right?

  13. I actually don’t see that a whole lot. Maybe because I am not looking for it? I am not sure, but wow…what a man that would do that!! Gotta find me one of those!!

  14. My hubby has been known to carry my purse…but only if my hands are full or I’m busy looking at a sales rack. I don’t think he would carry it for a whole mall trip or anything. (We’ve been married 3 1/2 years.)

  15. HOOLEEE SHIT! I cannot stop laughing. I’m picturing him carry a cute Kate Spade bag. 😆

    I saw this youngish looking man carrying his girl’s fuschia purse. She was carrying … NOTHING. Loved it.

    I carry sporty type bags, but would definitely invest in a girly-girl one if my husband carred it around sometimes. He has entirely too many keys and it weighs down my bag.

    @canape: The men in my mother’s family have always carried man purses.

  16. Bwahahahahaha!

    I cannot wait.

    Let me know when this happens, so I can start looking forward to it, too 🙂

  17. Coming from the land of too much cowboy mentality, I thank my lucky stars. My boyfriend of 6 years can fix my car, remodel the house, climb tall hills on his manly dirtbike, AND he carries my purse any time I ask him to. And he still has balls of steel. 🙂 He is a manly man, but he also knows how to be chivalrous and kind. It’s all about the luuuuuuv. If it will help your cause, I will snap a pic the next time he carries my DB pink and purple handbag.

  18. My ex-husband REFUSED to carry my purse no matter what else I was carrying. Might have something to do with the reason he’s the ex-husband? LOL

  19. This is totally off topic, but I’m not sure how else to reach you. I sent you an email to what I thought was your gmail address before Christmas, but I’m not sure that you got it. It is about a problem I’m having with my blog that you designed back in March 2005. If you could email me, I’d appreciate it.

  20. We’ve been married almost 22yrs and my hubby absolutely refuses to carry or hold my purse but he never asks me to carry his keys or wallet. So I guess we are even.

  21. Since becoming a stay-at-home dad, my husband has come to appreciate carrying the diaper bag and just how handy it is to have a bag to tote all sorts of useful stuff in. When we all go out together, I either carry a teeny little purse or none at all and drop my lipstick and keys in the diaper bag. He actually mentioned the other day that he’s going to miss having the diaper bag when the kids get older. I may have to buy him a man purse. 🙂

  22. M ine carries the diaper bag. We’ve been together for 14 yrs – does this help?

  23. supertiffx365 – join your favorite supertiff as she celebrates thirty years of super by remembering a person from her past in thirty words, everyday, for a whole damn year.
    supertiff says:

    tomorrow sounds good to me…

  24. When we enter an indoor area, my husband hands his sunglasses to me and I hate it. I usually just throw things into my purse, but with the no-covered sunglasses, I have to be extra careful. My husband used to carry the diaper bag, but it was black and looked like a messenger bag. I dont think you need to wait, just hand it to him the next time you are out together.

  25. My grandpas both carried my grandmas’ purses and I think it is so sweet and such a sign of true love. Screw pride, take care of your woman! Of course my man bitches and moans if I ask him to hold mine for 2 seconds so I have no hope of ever pawning it off on him for long periods but that doesn’t stop me from smiling when I see a man lugging one – especially when the woman is off somewhere and he’s just standing there waiting for her with a big old lady Vera Bradley in his hand!

  26. It all comes down to the pocket issue. Men get capacious ones in their pants, their jeans, their jackets, their coats. They have all sorts of hidden pockets. Pockets galore. Women? mostly get tiny, flat, useless pockets we’re reluctant to put anything in in the first place for fear of messing up the look of our outfit. It’s interesting that men are now getting self-conscious about this, too.

    My hubby knows this argument well. I use it all the time. I rarely carry a purse. If we have the baby along, he takes either her or the diaper bag. My wallet, etc.? Goes in HIS pockets a good 60% of the time. I hate to brag… but I guess I just did. (Who am I kidding? I love to brag about him. 🙂

    You can ask MrZ to do the same. Tell him it might help him get access to your …other pocket. 😉

  27. widgete – College student just trying to make it to the other side while majoring in education, practicing her cooking and make-up hobbies, marching in the band, and living the sorority life...
    Elyse says:

    Oooo me like the new look! 3 column blogs always intrigue me!

  28. New layoutz: you haz ones!

    Looks good! It’s a great balance of actual text and other columny stuff!

  29. That’s funny — my boyfriend has never asked me to put his wallet or keys in my purse. I’M always the one asking HIM if he’s bothered by carrying so much stuff in his pockets. (His answer? “No.”)

    But on the bright side, at least I don’t have to make room in MY purse!

  30. My husband wouldn’t be caught dead carrying my purse. Luckily, he uses a money clip so no big ole wallet for him, and I don’t mind the keys since they’re usually my set. He can never find his own. We’ve been married 16 years and he would never do it.

  31. My fiance carries my stuff. I hate purses…well no, I hate carrying purses, I love buying purses…so I tend to keep my stuff in a wristlet and then have him put it his pocket, along with my cell phone and sunglasses. And on the occasions when I do carry a purse, he’s a champ about holding it for me – especially when shopping! I had no idea we were against the norm!

  32. My bf does that too! However if we’re going somewhere and I don’t want anything but my asthma medicine (which I have to take everywhere) I’ll ask him to put it in his pocket.

    I once made my bf carry my bag while we were playing mini golf with his best friend from when he was a kid, and his gf. I must have been going through a particularly bratty stage in my life, he hated doing it so I don’t ask now.

  33. I don’t usually make Tim carry my purse, but I am a big fan of making him stuff my phone and keys in his pockets if I don’t feel like lugging my purse around. This is especially handy if we’re going out for a fancy night on the town (so, like, twice a year?) and I can’t find a purse to match whatever cute dress I’m wearing — just hand phone, keys, id, and credit card to Tim and enjoy the evening unencumbered!

  34. I carry my own crap. I’m not strong enough to carry my wife’s purse (which has something like three people’s lives totally contained within)

  35. My hubby will carry my purse when I have to carry other things (usually the toddler that won’t let me put her down or go to him). He will also take my diaper bag when he goes out alone with our daughter. It wasn’t that big of a deal when it was obviously a diaper bag, but I have since streamlined down to a large bright green coach bag that just looks like a purse. He will still take that, but puts it under the stroller most of the time.

  36. We’ve been married for 3 years by mid-januaury, and I have Rob carry my purse under the guise of it being a diaper bag. Bruhahaha! 😛

  37. My boyfriend makes me carry his keys and wallet, his blackberry and his cell phone when we go out… and then he makes fun of my huge purse! If we’re out for a long time, I totally make him carry it for awhile… otherwise my shoulder starts to cramp up.

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