My Reproductive Nightmare


The ultrasound showed the Zoot-bryo is still alive and kickin’ and possibly watching the latest episode of Ghost Whisperer on TiVo. It’s hard to tell.

Since this was a “normal” visit, the one where they treat me like I’m just your standard pregnant woman, I got asked the typical series of questions regarding my genetic history and my current drug use. The little sheet that I call the RED FLAG SHEET asks about all sorts of genetic cues, and then has the one question that is the only one I ever select “Yes” on: “History of pregnancy loss?” Yes. Thanks for asking.

They also asked me if I had any thoughts about whether I’ll go c-section or try a vaginal birth this time. The trendy term is VBAC meaning: Vaginal Birth after Cesarean. It’s all the rage, now, you know. Everyone is quite proud that the trends have proven that a woman can deliver vaginally successfully even after a cesarean. But you know what? No thank you.

For those of you who were here for NikkiZ’s birth, you’ll remember we were being induced when the sudden onset of fetal stress prompted a rushed/emergency c-section that had us delivering our miracle baby while shedding tears of fear in an operating room. We have no pictures or video of her birth because we had no time to grab the equipment.

We would rather avoid all of that, thank you. And just schedule the damn thing. I did the vaginal birth with LilZ, and it wasn’t that great. Not anything I feel incredibly desperate to revisit. And MrZ doesn’t feel like he’s at loss at all for possibly missing out on such an experience. The emergency c-section traumatized him as well. So if you ask us now? We’re totally c-section all the way. We may change our mind, but I doubt it. (Obligatory sidenote: Please do not tell me what I should choose or send me links to literature one way or another. I’m a wee emotional and will probably find it offensive. Thanks.)

And the fact that I can even discuss this in regards to a current pregnancy makes me smile with the light of a thousand suns.

60 thoughts on “CBACBAVB”

  1. Very awesome news Zoot. And seriously? Why the hell is a VBAC all the rage? Do whatever works for you.
    I keep reminding myself that if I end up with a C-Section for whatever reason … i do maintain, as one book very eloquently put it, vaginal integrity. Ahem!

    Birth is magical regardless of where it comes out. πŸ™‚

  2. TOTALLY awesome news about Zoot-bryo’s progress so far (my god, seriously, how cute is that word even!).

    hang in there little buddy…

  3. Oh, the VBAC discussion. The very fact that anyone cares what another woman does with her vagina boggles my damn MIND, really it does.

    I’m happy for you, Zoot. Fingers continue to be crossed for a wonderful outcome all around. And good for you for declining the bag!

  4. I totally understand where you’re coming from. I’ve never done the vaginal birth thing, but I’ve had emergency and I’ve had scheduled. The scheduled was VASTLY better. Not even a comparison. It was seriously the best day of my life. Like 10 birthdays all rolled into one. But most of all, the person who best knows what you should do is you. And that’s all the explanation you need.

  5. I’m so glad everything is still okay with the pregnancy!

    I’m probably slow, but it took me several minutes to figure out what the title of this post stood for. And then I was disproportionately proud of myself for getting it.

  6. Well, there’s this great website…

    JUST KIDDING! I would never do that to you!

    I am smiling ear to ear now. I am so happy for you guys!

    And don’t let anyone tell you any different. You do what’s best for you and your family. It’s your body. You want a C-section, have a C-section!

    It doesn’t matter how it comes out!!

  7. Well it does kinda matter how it comes out I guess… you don’t want a baby coming out of your mouth or your bum-bum….

    Still smilin’ πŸ˜€

  8. Hooray for the good news!

    No matter how Baby Zoot comes out – You will be healthy and you will have a healthy baby!

  9. Congrats! As for VBAC – overrated. It was SO much nicer to be able to schedule it and prepare – I had someone to watch my older child and it was like Christmas!

  10. I like to talk a good game about going VBAC with this baby. But, this may be the first time I’ve said it aloud, you make a great argument for the scheduled C-section.
    We have no pictures of Henry’s birth. I couldn’t even hold him after he was delivered, I was in the DTs and I certainly couldn’t nurse him.
    I’d like a whole other birth experience, one in which we DO have pictures/documentation. One that I’ll REMEMBER!
    [also? with a c-section? pretty babies! no cone heads!]

  11. Yeah! I am so happy that babyZ is doing well. And I am also glad I am not the only one with Ghost Whisperer on my TiVO. I don’t know anyone else who watches it. As for the c-section I’m 100% behind you on that. I had an emergency c-section with my son after I went into distress and I do not want a repeat.

  12. I’ve done the trifecta – a scheduled section, a vbac, and an emergency section – in that order. I like to tell myself that it makes me worldly in the childbirth arena – ha! You’ll do what’s right for you. Congrats on the great visit – glad to hear Zoot-bryo is looking good!

  13. That is fantastic news! And, Zoot? You do whatever you have to to protect your baby (and yourself). If that means scheduling a C-section, go for it! Your baby is MUCH more important than someone’s opinion on the matter. (Besides, it’s none of their business anyway, right?!)

  14. Yay! So glad to hear that everything seems to be going well.

    I hate that everyone tells people what they should do for their births. I mentioned that next time I want to try for a VBAC to someone and she started telling me how risky it was. Gah! I do think it’s interesting that some people have a c-section and decide that they want to do it again, but only because I hated mine so much that the idea of doing it again is terrifying. To each her own, you know?

  15. Ugh. I’m so over the whole “do it my way or your child will end up friendless, unloved and holding the slow sign on the side of the road” nonsense. You are that child’s mother and only you and your doctor can decide what form of birth is right for that child. Anyone who tells you different should butt out. Harrumph.

    Great news, btw.

  16. We had an unplanned c-section with Zoe and that worked out just fine for us. Whenever another baby comes along… another c-section sounds fine to me.

    I don’t really believe it matters how you give birth. The important part all comes after that!

  17. Way to go, zoot-bryo!

    I had an emergency c-section after many hours of labor with my first, then attempted vbac 7 years later with my second. Guess what? I ended up with another many hours of (back) labor then another c-section. Trying vbac totally wasn’t worth it for me, I wish I’d figured it out a lot sooner and skipped all the pain.

    Either way, it’s your body, your baby, and completely your decision.

  18. Having had now 2 vaginal births, I totally get the wanting the C-section. Good for you and congrats on the great appointment!

  19. Wonderful news that Zoot-bryo is doing the Zydeco in your uterus. May it ever be so. I’m with you, I tried for a VBAC on the second birth and I ended up with a ruptured uterus and an emergency c-section instead of a planned one. So not worth it to me. I so support you in doing whatever YOU feel is right for you and Mr. Zoot.

  20. Just glad all looks like it’s going fine for you and baby. Would never presume to convince you to do anything. I don’t even share birth stories with pregnant women. We’re all different.

  21. Congratulations on your Zoot-bryo! I had an emergency c-section with my first baby, and had a lot of depression issues as a result. For some reason, I ended up feeling like a failure, and even though I know that’s ridiculous, I can’t shake the feeling. So for me, it’s VBAC all the way if I can. If I can’t, I’ll manage next time just like I did this time.

    What I REALLY can’t stand is every other mother out there telling me how much they LOVED their c-section (as if that’s supposed to make me feel like less of a freak for hating mine!) and how I”m insane to want a VBAC next time. Thank God I have a doctor willing & open enough to give me the pros and cons of both and allowing me to decide.

    So what I really want to say is that I think it’s absolutely wonderful that you know you want a c-section, and to heck with every bonehead out there who can’t respect and celebrate your decision with you. It is not an easy one to make, and I wish people would understand that pressure either way does not make it easier! You do what’s best for you, because in the end that’s always what’ best for baby too – WAY TO GO!

  22. Fantastic news. I will keep my fingers cautiously crossed for you.

    Baby 1 was an unplanned c-section. When baby 2 was on her way, the doc and I talked about VBAC. Her stance: do whatever you like, we’ll support you BUT… but she wouldn’t induce me, even if I went over. And since there were complications with #1 that lead to c-section, I could get all the way to 9cm (again) and still end up in the OR. And the deal sealer? I’m so freaking type A that knowing EXACTLY when the baby would come totally made my day. Also, recovering from a c-section the 2nd time around is a cake-walk compared to the unplanned (YMMV). With the unplanned you have so many drugs on-board because of the progressing vaginal birth… with a planned c-section, you only get what you need (ah, the beloved spinal).

    No matter what you choose – we’ll support you! But really, do you know that giant baby head will come out your vajayjay if you don’t have a c-section?

  23. i’m so excited that you got to see the zootbryo!
    also, i’m rather proud that you rejected the ‘goodie’ bag.
    was so with you on that one…i hardly ever stand up for myself in situations like that.

  24. Personally I have no attachment to the idea of squeezing anything out of my Va Jay Jay. I am all about the C-section! WHo cares how they get here…as long as they get here!

  25. Great News! Congrats on the appointment.

    Loved both my C-Sections (one required, one elective), like you never saw the reason to do the VBAC thing. You’ll discover one of the hidden joys of the planned C is you get to be all easy-breazy covergirl in all the pictures..

  26. Yay! So happy to hear the ultrasound went well:) I had a VBAC with my second son. It was natural and he weighed 10 pounds 8 ounces and got stuck at the very end. As my doctor was stitching me up I remember saying, “Dude, if we ever have a third, I am totally scheduling a C-section.” She looked at me warily and said, “Thank you.” Best to always do what akes you feel safe and happy. Congrats again!

  27. Glad to hear everything is going swimmingly! *swims*

    I had a c-section with my son, not my first choice.. but after having gone through it, I’ll take another one if there is a next time.

    And I totally just spit my coffee over Melizzards comment.

  28. Yeah for happy news!!! And I have never had a baby or actually thought seriously about doing so. Of course the fact that I’ve never been married or anywhere close might have something to do with that. But, I digress, I would think that a C-section would be the way to go. But you and MrZ do whatever you see fit. It’s your baby!

  29. Sending positive vibes your way.

    I was going to suggest that you say thank you, rest the bag on a chair in the waiting room, and conveniently forget it when you depart.

  30. Damn. My reader missed this or something because I am only just getting this via Parenting Sites 411 (thanks, Marilyn!!!!)

    Congrats! I am so glad things are going well!

  31. Although I am not a daily reader, I do try to catch up on the life and times of Zoot every few months. It makes for some great reading. This time I have had to go back several months and I still think I missed a few. But what good news I found. I hope things are still going good with the pregnancy!! Congratulations to all and Happy Thanksgiving, Happy Birthday and Birthing days!

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