Last night I was yelling/getting onto/nagging/bitching to LilZ about how much time he spends on the phone. I was doing the typical boring rant about, “I’ve trusted you to make good decisions yourself but you’re forcing me to have to step in.” I possibly also threw in the very uncreative, “Why don’t you do something that doesn’t rot your brain?” and even the world famous, “Do you remember reading? You used to do that you know.” Yes, I know. I need to work on my material.
Anyway – I’m sure it was excruciatingly annoying for LilZ as I finger-wagged and huffed for 15 minutes. He does a good job of tolerating these rants and trying to find the main point in there somewhere. All the while, NikkiZ was standing there waiting for the storm to die down so she could get some attention. As soon as I was “done” (are we really ever done?) she smiled, turned to LilZ as he walked back to his room (presumably to cuss me out), pointed her finger at him and started saying, “Wah blah nomokiu woiuiefl,” all with a very faux-angry and stern tone. But with the evil grin on her face.
My daughter was mocking me. She might not have understood the words, and she definitely couldn’t replicate them, but she picked up the sentiment and was making fun of me for it. She was mocking me. MOCKING ME. And she was doing a damn hilarious job of it. She even had her shoulder hunched and her eyes squinty. Just like I do.
She is evil, that child. Pure evil.
It’s too bad LilZ wasn’t in the mood to enjoy it. I told him later about it and we tried to recreate it, but she has learned one thing: Some performances can not be given on demand with the same effect. He will simply have to wait until the next time I decide to go off about something, and then she’ll break out her best material. Next time I’m predicting she’ll grab a towel to throw down on the counter or possibly kick a garbage can for good measure. You have to keep things fresh when mocking your parents, you know.