Thing 2

Dear vomit cleaner – may blessings reign upon you

A few weeks ago NikkiZ had a weird moment where she choked on a piece of bread, and about 1 second from me giving the Heimlich, she puked up the attacking morsel. Ever since that night, she’ll have these episodes when she eats something she either doesn’t like the taste or texture of, and she’ll gag. A few times she has puked a little, but usually she just gags and spits the food out. I don’t know if it’s a fear response from the scary incident a few weeks ago – or if that moment intensified her gag reflex. Either way – it’s been weird.

Yesterday morning we picked up a few things at Target and stopped into Starbucks for a muffin. She took a bite of the tough crust and did the gag thing. I picked her up just in case she puked a little and she PROJECTILE VOMITED ALL OVER ME. Let me tell you how bad it was: I was scared to stand up, fearing it would spill on the floor. I essentially had a puddle in my lap. It was AWESOME.

I momentarily froze. What do I do? I couldn’t really ask for the employees to help because they were busy with a long line of customers. I looked around, hoping for a friendly face, and I made eye-contact with a lovely lady who immediately saw the desperation in my eyes and asked, “Do you need some help?”

She proceeded to get me some paper towels, wet and dry, and helped me clean up the mess. She actually helped clean up my daughter’s vomit off the floor. She also pointed out that it was all over my back and ass as well. She helped me while I stripped NikkiZ naked and did the best I could to wipe myself off. I was still covered, but at least I could stand up without flooding the place. We got the place cleaned up and I thanked the girl profusely and escaped as the woman covered in vomit carrying a naked child.

I told the woman “Thanks” about a million times, but since I was desperate to escape, I still don’t feel I thanked her enough. I have made silent wishes since yesterday that the lovely woman in Starbucks gets blessings showered upon her. I hope her sick family becomes well, that her professional dreams become reality, that her friends are loyal and that she wins the Powerball. Someone who takes that step to help a stranger deserves the best of everything. Seriously – her kindness moved me.

Of course – so did the vomit soaking through my underwear onto my ass. I got the hell out of there as fast as I could while NikkiZ screamed, “Muffin! Muffin!” because I had dared to throw the rest of the muffin away. In other words? She was fine – the one piece was just a bit crunchy for her palette. Essentially? She puked on me for the sake of a good time. She’s the life of the party like that.

6 thoughts on “Dear vomit cleaner – may blessings reign upon you”

  1. My daughter’s going through a strange gag phase, and her pediatrician say that some children actually like the feeling of the gag reflex.

    She says if the child is not upset, and still wants to eat afterward (especially if they’re smiling right after), they like it.

    It’s a whole “physical experience” thing…maybe she lkes the sensation!

  2. I am so glad I read this, because last night, I googled,”My 18 month old daughter eats, then gags, then barfs”. I feel better now. Now if you could explain her shoe fascianation I would be all good.

  3. knowing your religious stance I’ll skip the angel thing & instead mention one of my favorite movies of all time – ever

    Pay it forward.

    You’ll see the opportunity(s) crop up & if you pay it forward, so will someone else and hopefully soon enough this will be a nicer world all around.

  4. My son did the same thing. Everytime he jumped in the pool and swallowed any water up it came with lunch or breakfast. Somehow the kindness of strangers does not occur when it floats by them in the pool. Thank God he has outgrown it.

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