LilZ had one of his first girlfriend dramas tonight. His girlfriend is jealous of the time he spends with his childhood friend. I understand it from the girlfriend’s point of view – boys his age just don’t befriend girls. But – it’s tricky because she’s the daughter of my best friend, we run carpool together, it’s not like we can make any changes. So – I found myself giving him advice and actually encouraging him to text her kinda late at night even though I’m sure her parents would disapprove, I just wanted to give him a chance to make her feel better. Even if she didn’t get the message tonight – hopefully it will make her feel better tomorrow. Love is hard. Add pre-puberty hormone surges and co-ed friendships into the mix and you have nothing but disaster.
This is the mantra I just kept repeating, “Junior High SUCKS. But I promise it will get better. I PROMISE.” At one point I even said, “I’ve been through affairs, broken friendships, divorce and fertility issues and NOTHING compares to the depression and tears I cried in Junior High. That was much worse.”
And I was NOT lying. I remember several times during the darkest times of my adult life thinking, “Man, life is kinda sucky right now. But I still wouldn’t trade it for 7th grade. EVER.”
He actually said at one point, “Sometimes I wish I could just die, or skip the next two years.”
Now, on one hand? I’m so glad he can still talk to me about that stuff. On the other hand? I just wanted to hold him and never let him leave the house again. But I felt the same thing at that age. I remember it vividly. Everytime I got a headache or migraine (often) I would hope it was a terminal tumor that would take me out in my sleep. (Dramatic enough of an exit?) I remember thinking I couldn’t do it a second longer. Junior High sucked the most giant sweaty donkey balls ever – and I would never EVER do it again.
And yes, I told LilZ that too. And I promised him one day he’d look back, like I do now, and wish he could have told himself, “She’s right. It will get AWESOME one day. Trust her.”
Because LilZ? You are the most amazing young man I’ve ever known. You are handsome, attractive, smart and my GOD you are funny. You make me laugh so much (like suggesting that I put crack rock in the snacks for the pool party) that I am convinced you will make millions of people smile in your life. I hope I can do that even just a little bit for you to help you get through these next few years. And remember – if you ever need me to – I’m totally up for kicking anyone’s ass you need me to.