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I’d like some lard with my grease, please.

We decided to try this new Mexican Cantina/Restaurant for dinner last night. It is called Salsaritas and I believe it’s a chain – so you may have one in your home town! Now, if you’ll recall, Mexican food is my all-time favorite and LilZ’s DNA is built entirely of refried beans as all I ate my last trimester of my pregnancy with him was Bean Dip from our local Mexican dive. So, I take my Mexican food very seriously. I have no idea what the food is like in Mexico, but mexican food in Alabama? It’s damn good.

Well, this place had no refried beans. Let me repeat myself: NO REFRIED BEANS. Now, MrZ was all “The chicken is yummy! Salsa is hot! Vegetables are fresh!” But – did you hear? NO REFRIED BEANS. Hell, even Taco Bell has refried beans. I want to leave my Mexican restaurant (A) Smelling like grease (B) Feeling like I just at an elephant deep friend in day old grease. I like my Mexican food HEAVY and incredibly UNHEALTHY. I want my refried beans REFRIED. With sinful amounts of butter/grease/lard/whatever makes them yummy.

In short? I want to order an angioplasty with my burrito. None of this Fresh! shit for me. Bah. Black beans? NOT REFRIED? What the hell good is that going to do me?

In other words? I hated the damn place and am now craving a REAL burrito, with REAL refried beans. For breakfast. And that’s just gross. Even by my standards.

Update from 2020: I still feel the same way which is why I don’t love Chipotle or Taco Mama – two similar places that everyone loves. 

22 thoughts on “I’d like some lard with my grease, please.”

  1. Normally? I’m NOT a bean fan. But, when it comes to Mexican food? There better be a huge ass heap of them [refried, please] piled on my plate [even better if the cheese sauce from Casablanca is covering them].
    So, yeah, I don’t know if I could have handled it either.
    I agree – Alabama Mexican food is damn good! 🙂

  2. I don’t find that gross at all. My stomach doesn’t watch the clock. I’m all for the fresh ingredients, but refried beans are a MUST. If you are ever in NY I can direct you to some damn fine Mexican restaurants. There is a high-end Mexican restaurant off Times Square that is fab. It’s a small place with dim lighting often frequented by celebs that you might like. My favorite is in Yonkers though. Not so pricey, also has fresh ingredients. Both offer REFRIED beans on their menu.

    I’m going to have to find time to cook some Mexican food this weekend now.

    Have a good weekend.

  3. We actually went there a couple of nights ago. Mainly for my interest in the margarita bar, which was not fully ready to go. I wasn’t very impressed with the food, it was okay I suppose. I guess it is typical for the chain mexican burrito restaurants.

  4. Here in Tampa we have some great Mexican places, but the best Mexican food I have ever eaten was in Tuscaloosa, AL. I don’t remember the name of the place, but it was so stinking good. I know my cousins who went to school there ate there all the time.

  5. I’m in the Tampa Bay area too, and i’ve never heard of such a thing there ought to be a law in Bama!

  6. Call me gross then. I have been known to have a bean burrito (made ONLY with refried beans) for breakfast. Because YUM!

  7. i was never a big fan of mexican food (except when i was in mexico, of course. guess b/c it was authentic?). anywho, pDaddy and i went to a mexican chain restaurant tuesday night (chevy’s). i wasn’t too thrilled b/c they all seem the same to me. but, i have to say, i was satisfied w/my din-din as was pDaddy. looks like i’m slowly changing my mind about mexican food AND they had sangria as their “drink special” that night 🙂 that always helps 🙂

  8. 1. No beans? Obviously, those aren’t real Mexicans. Beware!!! 😉
    2. I just found out that the owner of my favorite Mexican place is in the Mexican mafia. And while they have fresh! ingredients and refried beans, I’m now not so likely to enjoy being there anymore. Esp. when the owner comes up to your table to ask how things are going. *shudder*

  9. juan’s flying burritos are the bomb. yes the bomb. they take up the whole freakin plate. guess what i am gonna have for dinner now??? 🙂 🙂 crap i just looked at their menu online and you wouldn’t like it. not a mention of refried beans….but its a darn good burrito. i promise!

  10. Me!Too!
    Arun was constructed almost entirely of beef tacos in my 1st trimester (which was actually odd, because I don’t normally eat beef tacos and prefer bean burritos). Towards the end, it was “where am I going tonight” instead of “What’s for dinner?”. It horrified my husband because in one of my life’s Great Travesties, I somehow married someone who does NOT like Mexican food. What was I thinking? One time as we headed towards a family thing with Mexican food on the menu, yet again, he asked “Why does your family eat so much Mexican – You’re not Mexican!”. Funny guy….funny guy…..

  11. I am such a mexican food addict. I don’t mind different styles of beans (although refried are the best – preferably with melted cheese on top), but I must have my burrito absolutely SWIMMING in green chile. Nothing worse than a dry burrito.

    On a side note, I spent the summer of 2004 in Spain. In Spain, a place very far from Mexico, there is very little mexican food. It wasn’t until I was 2 weeks into the trip and was craving burritos so bad that I spent a great amount of time finding a tiny mexican restuarnt in the phone book and highlighting the route on my map of the city that I realized just how addicted I was. The burrito I got was sub-par, but damn if those weren’t the best nachos i’ve ever tasted (there was nothing special about them except that they were mexican food! that was spicy! and i hadn’t had any for 14 whole days!)

  12. Hey, I had Taco Bell last night, and there was enough refried beans in that grilled burrito for you and me both! Just go there…it’s probably even cheaper! : )-

  13. When I lived in Texas I discovered the magic of the breakfast taco. You could have whatever you wanted in that tortilla, adding breakfast to the title made it OK.

  14. Random thought, after my last comment I realized that MrZ may think it’s fun that my cousin is Jarret Johnson of Alabama fame. Not that it really means anything, but he might think it’s cool that one of you avid readers is related to a former Alabama all-star.

  15. Oh my Miss Zoot.

    My first born was incubated in beans to. I ate burritos morning noon and night. My poor husband.

    I have passed my love for all things beany to her. She is in lurve with it all.

  16. I live in New Mexico and don’t like the Mexican food here but love Tex-Mex (what I grew up on). In NM they tend to serve pinto beans instead of refried beans and I always so disappointed when I get my plate.
    When I was at my parents in Texas last week I had to go to my favorite dive….I had a cheese enchilada and tamale covered in red sauce, a beef taco, and sides of Mexican rice and refried beans….it was sooo good! Oh and we had a basket of chips and salsa with HUGE glasses of iced tea. Now I’m hungry.

  17. It’s not at all wrong to want a burrito with beans for breakfast! I had the most awesome “huevos rancheros” in Hawaii and it would have been every bit as good without the “huevos”. Picture a tortilla with a layer each of refried beans, salsa, guacamole, and cheese, with a dollop of sour cream. What could be a better breakfast than that?

  18. I hate eating Mexican food out here in the DC area. I have found ONE place that serves refried beans, and that’s only if I ask for it. I always thought “rice and beans” meant rice and refried beans, none of this whole pinto bean crap. I really miss good Mexican food. You’d think with all the ethnic minorities in a place like this we’d get something good, but it doesn’t seem to be teh case (I’m from Oregon).

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