That shit hurt like hell. I’m telling you – that was the worst dentist visit I’ve ever had – and that includes all of my orthodontist visits from my teens. COMBINED. My jaw is still sore from keeping it open for two hours straight and my headaches from the hour of non-stop drilling. OW.
But – I have a temporary set of teeth made of acrylic. The same shit I would have on my nails if I went for a manicure. That totally freaks me out, for some reason. I’m incredibly humiliated from the entire dental experience and kinda just want to pretend that I was born with these pretty acrylic teeth and that there is nothing different about my smile today than yesterday. MrZ doesn’t understand why I’m so insecure about it – but I am – who the hell knows.
The entire top half of my face was numb for HOURS. My lips were chapped from the ordeal so I had to look in the mirror to apply chapstick since I couldn’t feel my lips. Watching myself apply chapstick but not being able to feel it? Cracked my shit UP for some reason. I just kept laughing at myself, which made it worse because I couldn’t move my top lip so laughing made my face look all contorted and goofy which made me laugh harder.
And then I yelled at myself for laughing at myself because, Dammit! I’m insecure. Quit laughing at me.
Okay – maybe I overdosed on novacaine and am now officially insane. Or maybe I’m just tired and totally dreading part two of this whole experience. Part one sucked donkey ass – and that may be an understatement. What’s worse than donkey ass?