Thing 1

Rite of Passage

Guess what LilZ had to do at school yesterday? Watched a video about puberty. Hehe. I remember doing the same thing in the 5th grade. We were separated from the boys and taught about puberty from a nun while the boys were taught by a priest.

Crazy Catholics.

LilZ was just appalled that it was even necessary, until we informed him that not every family openly talks to their children about sex like our family does. I remember it being very important that I teach LilZ the proper words for body parts because when I was in 2nd or 3rd grade, I thought that puberty was the point when my body would physically change and I would go from having a “Pee Pee” to having a “vagina” and I was really scared. I had no idea what a vagina was but I was fairly certain I didn’t want one. I don’t think I figured out that a “Pee Pee” was a “vagina” until my parents gave me one of those cartoon books that teach kids about sex. And I remember feeling such relief I wanted to cry. I thought we’d avoid that with the kids by not using cutesy words for private parts. This technique resulted in one of my favorite young LilZ moments when he proclaimed “Mom! My scrotum is sticking to my leg again!” after a bath and in front of a LOT of company.

Kids rule.

So, he was amazed that some kid thought that going through puberty was just getting pregnant. He was amazed some of the boys didn’t know what a tampon was. And he was mortified that their class had to actually be shown a diagram of a penis.

“Was that REALLY necessary?” he asked.

They were sent home with a booklet explaining all the things a boy can expect with his changing body. And deodorant (hint, hint). They were NOT sent home with a condom which is what some kid’s older brother told them they’d get. I had to break it to LilZ that sending 5th grade boys home with a condom would NOT go over well anywhere, but especially in Alabama.

So, he survived the day. He’d been dreading it for awhile because “Who wants to listen to a teacher talking about penises all day?”

Amen, LilZ.

9 thoughts on “Rite of Passage”

  1. I’d totally forgotten about that. I shall now be forced to quiz my 5th grader if he’s had the “talk” at school yet. I’m not sure he would mention it.

    Oh, and we also followed the ‘call them what they are’ school of thought.

  2. That is funny! My 9 yo 4th grader is awaiting the “movie”. A friend told him that the teacher would be discussing “penis hair” and he thinks it is crazy to need a talk about that.

  3. The scrotum story is very cute. I too went to Christian school, but they did such a great job with sex-ed that I thought, until I was about 15, that you could get pregnant by sitting next to a boy, and that sex was only something dirty girls did.

    At least it was better than my aunt who when she was a kid thought that once you got married you prayed for God to send you a baby and that’s how you got pregnant.

    So good for you for teaching him the way things are so that he doesn’t have to live with all that confusion and the embarrassment that happens when you find out the truth.

  4. Well, I was told that if we french kissed we’d go to hell if we died or we’d get pregnant..Now you tell me…where the hell did that come from..I’m not sure how I found out how pregnancy occurred but obviously I found out. Lucky LilZ. Ignorance is certainly not bliss, its usually trouble…

  5. heeee! Brendan is having the same class at school right now too…although they aren’t learning EXACTLY about the birds and bees they are sort of vaguely learing about them (Bren is a year younger than LilZ remember). And he knows all the right names for things…however…I believe he is a little confused about female anatomy…infact I think he might believe we have just a really TEENY TINY penis….I don’t know why he thinks that and now that he’s 10? He refuses to even discuss it. He would throw up right on my very own feet if I even started to say the world vagina…infact the city Regina? Makes me him green…the state Virginia? Makes me squirm. BOYS! I tell you.

  6. I remember our video. It was 5th grade and we watched this stupid video about a bunch of girls at a sleepover and one got her first period (and she was the first in the bunch) and then the mom explained what that was over breakfast by making UTERUS AND OVARY SHAPED PANCAKES!!!

  7. heh heh, scrotum story. At least we were alone. We also use mostly the ‘real’ words. My hubby used to sleep in the buff, until the eldest girl, then 4, pointed at him one morning and giggled. He asked why she was laughing as he headed off to the bathreoom and she told him that he had better be careful on the toilet, he might sit on his penises!

    He started wearing pj bottoms then.

  8. Unlike you, I didn’t teach the proper terminology to my son. When he was about 3 we went to the grocery store and he very loudly annouced “Mama, my pee-pee’s standing up!”

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