Ten Years.

Happy Birthday, LilZoot,

Holy Crapoley. You’re ten years old today. I was 18 when I found out I was pregnant with you and I was scared to death. I was scared of telling my Dad, I was scared of being homeless, I was scared of going to college with a kid, and I was scared of getting married. But I was NEVER scared of being a Mom. I knew, the second I saw that positive pregnancy test, that I would most definitely be a good Mom.

Many things have happened in our lives since then. Your father and I split up. I spent seven years in college. You grew up in computer labs and university libraries. You proctored your first college exam at age five when one of my professors asked you to watch her students while she ran an errand. You sat in on a MS Powerpoint Class I taught and picked up on more at age six than most of the adults in the class. You spent the night in front of a Lion Cage for a fundraiser. We moved seven times. Once? From one apartment to the one next door so the psycho guy who lived underneath us would quit scaring us to death by banging on our floor. We both spent the night in a castle at my college. I guess your childhood was not what most would consider normal.

But – after one divorce, two college degrees, and one new marriage – we are finally living a relatively normal life. However, you never complained about the chaos of the first several years of your life – and you still dont complain about the chaos that still remains. You get in a car, every other Friday, and travel 300 miles to see your Dad. You get back in the car the following Sunday, and travel the 300 miles back home. And you never flinch.

You are an amazing child. Those words seem so simple, yet they are so true. You have taught me so much in the last ten years. You have inspired me to become better as the days go on. There were a few times in the first five years of your life, that I felt like the only thing keeping me going in this world was you. The only light in my life, the only thing “good”, the only thing that made me happy, was you. I will always be in debt to you for that – and I will always try my best to be a good mom to repay you for that light you have added to my life.

I hope that with each birthday – your years get better. But if you do experience those dark times, like we all do, I hope I can provide the light in your life, the hope, the love that you showed me. I will always be here for you, no matter what, waiting to give you a monster hug and an upside-down kiss. My specialties – of course.

I love you.

Happy Birthday, LilZoot.

54 thoughts on “Ten Years.”

  1. Okay..not a little sniffling – full blown boo-hooing here. What a wonderful tribute to your guy… I think you are BOTH lucky to have each other. You are a great Mom Zoot.. Happy Birthday LilZoot!

  2. Happy Birthday LilZoot!! I hope you have a great day. It sounds to me that you have had a blast with such an interesting first 10 years as well as a wonderful, strong, smart Mom. Have a fun day!

  10. You’re an awesome mom to an awesome kid. Happy 10th, LilZ! Have a great day and don’t forget to hug your mom! 🙂

  11. Happy Birthday, LilZ! I hope it’s a great one – turning 10 is such a mile stone! I’m sure you know but your mom loves you greatly. ^_^

    Awesome post, Zoot. He’s lucky to have you as a mom. ^_^

  12. A wonderful post Zoot, Im sitting here at my desk crying my eyes out thank you very much. You are a great person, your son is lucky to have you! You doing a great job with him!
    Happy Birthday Lil Z

  15. So Zoot that makes you.. about twenty five, right?

    And I truly hope LilZ knows how good he has it. Happy Birthday, Dude. Enjoy the zebra movie 🙂

  19. Pass the tissues my way!
    That’s a wonderful post you wrote Zoot, thank you for sharing that with us. 🙂

    Happy Birthday LilZoot – have a great day!

  20. Happy Birthday LILZ! What an amazing letter! I would say he is verrryyyy lucky to have lived a not so normal childhood! He is lucky to have YOU! And yes indeed, you are very blessed to have him. I hope me and my boys follow in your footsteps by having a strong bond when they are 10!

    Have a GREAT BDAY WEEKEND!

    Kelly

  21. Happy, Happy Birthday – Sweetest LilZ. There’s no other little boy in the world I would have rather had my sweet Ariel sleep w/ for the first time. 🙂

  23. We all know that you’ll have to rebel at some point, LilZ. But if you ever get the “nobody likes me” blues that happen to everyone, read this post. Your mom adores you, and with good reason. You’re both wonderful!

  24. Happy Birthday, Lil Zoot. I hope you have fun at the movies with your Mom and your firends even though you are having to go see the silly movie first.

  29. And (not that Zoot is reading right now, they are probably at Hooters getting a lap dance for LilZ), Movie Mom has reviewed Are We There Yet and given it a “C”.

    Which means I would run nuns down with my honda to get to the theater before anybody else and check it out.

    (just kidding! There aren’t any nuns between here and the theater!)

  39. What a wonderfully touching post – wishing lilZ a very happy birthday and a great year ahead.

  43. my parents were in a similar situation as you…had me at 18 blah blah. however, they stayed together, had more kids, but have a shitty marriage which led to a shitty childhood for me. so i commend you on making what was probably a tough decision, to divorce. sounds like it was the best thing for little zoot. he’s a lucky kid to have a mom like you.

  50. Is it too late to wish LZ a happy birthday? Happy birthday, LZ! Ten is a great birthday, what with the whole entry into double-digits. Ten rocks. As does your beautiful mom.

    (sniffle, sniffle, big honkin’ nose blow)

  53. zoot:
    I think is the greatest entry you have ever written you have just given me such inspiration!
    I found out last month that I am pregnant! the guy I have been with for 5 years, has left me alone to go throuhg everything myself! ITS SO HARD! but knowing you can and that there are other women whi have done it really gives me hope, during this rough time. happy birthday to LilZ! may he have a great year with a great MOm.

  54. Happy B’day LilZ! Mine’s just eight days past your’s. Even if I’d not met you, I’d know that you totally rock since you’re an Aquarian. One decade in the can, 100 more to go. 😉

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