The End Of A Long Saga.

I don’t remember when we first started talking about selling our house. That house was supposed to be our “Forever Home” – we were going to fix it up (like we did our old house) and have maybe one or two more kids in it. But my last miscarriage made us decide maybe we’d had too many losses and we were sick of trying, and we started putting our time and money into doing endurance training and E showed every indication that he’d be getting out of Alabama AS FAST AS POSSIBLE upon college graduation. All of these things meant we had to accept the house was not going to be our “Forever Home” like we had planned. I think we finally had that discussion about 3 years ago.

Long story short? We finally closed yesterday. We no longer own a home.

This has been such a weird stretch of months. I’ve been dealing with a lot of new anxiety following the election in November and then the home sale and 2+ months of delays and now my aunt has died during the month that is ALWAYS terrible because it’s the month my Dad spent in hospice and – OH YEAH – my kid graduates from college in May and he’s trying to find a way to live/work in NYC immediately afterwards. So, you know, he won’t be a weekend drive away any longer. And I’m not sure I’m okay with that.

I’m not sure I’m okay with any of it.

I plan on life settling back down this weekend. I’m driving to Knoxville (again) today for the funeral services for my aunt and then driving back to Alabama (again) on Thursday and THEN! Then I can finally get my shit together and maybe shake off this funk. There’s always the post-vacation funk but add that to the funeral-funk and Month Of Grief funk on top of the Political Anxiety Funk and HOLY SHIT, I HAVE A LOT OF FUNK AND NOT AT ALL THE GOOD KIND.

Sidenote: Speaking of the good kind of funk, I saw George Clinton and the P-Funk Allstars back in 1995/1996 at Montevallo. It hit me that it was in the same theatre where I just watched E do his stuff a few weeks ago. THAT WAS A VERY SURREAL REALIZATION.

So here’s to being free of a mortgage for a little while. And free of cleaning my home. And free of worrying about all of the things that come with all of that nonsense. After the last “delay” of the closing Donnie said, “I don’t want to every buy or sell another house ever again.”

AND I KINDA AGREE.

The only thing keeping us from staying in this apartment forever is the fact that A) We’re sick of walking the dog and B) Nikki would really like to sleep in a room with a door.

So we’ll pay off our student loans (Yes. We still have student loans.) and then we’ll start looking for a MUCH SMALLER home. One that we could actually maintain with our current level of time and money. I’ll avoid travel for a little while (I HATE TRAVELING. I HAVE BEEN DOING SO MUCH OF IT.) and get my schedule back on track.

No mortgage. We’re going to sit on that a bit.

10 Comments

  • Alexa

    Congratulations! I’m so happy for your guys. I remember seeing an Instagram post or something saying you still hadn’t closed a few weeks ago and feeling bad for you. So YAY!

    And on a sadder note, I’m very sorry for your loss. Your aunt sounded like an incredible woman.

  • AlisonC

    I think that was one last gift from your aunt. So happy that you have one less burden. I hope you can get everything in place now so you can feel less anxious

  • Fraulein N

    Thank goodness! At least you don’t have to worry about the house selling now, on top of grief and anxiety over everything else. Have a break and a beer. I’m not sure what the housing market’s like down there, but would you be able to find a home to RENT? That way you get the space you need, without the stress of worrying about being solely responsible for that space. Just an idea.

  • Beth

    Having no mortgage ricks. We had no mortgage for a while in the late 90’s and early 2000’s. Then we decided to buy another home. So back to mortgage. After getting out budgeting shit together, we decided to get rid of the damn mortgage and started paying triple the monthly amount. Bye bye mortgage. We went to pay it off, then celebrated at Panera !!!! I am so glad the house is sold. I hope that the perfect house is out there for you.

  • Heather

    As I’ve commented before, I have a son with the EXACT SAME BIRTHDAY as E. But my son changed majors and needs an extra year to graduate. From college. In Scotland. And now he’s talking about grad school. In the UK.

    I hear ya!

    On the other hand, I live in NYC and will have an empty bedroom….

  • junkie

    1 – buy a little land there where y’all want to settle
    2 – fence it in
    3 – build/buy S-M “tiny” house for y’all & pets
    4 – build/buy small tiny house for E/guests/etc
    5 – move in & get settled…ENJOY!!!
    6 – send invites… We will come. ?

    XO

  • Liz

    I love reading your blog and your thoughts. We’re going to Universal this summer and your posts are helping me with my planning. We are buying the wands. I’m getting them for my children and may get one for me too. I’m sharing this, because you have a positive impact on people you may not be aware of. Thank you. Since the election, I’ve been having a rough time. I’m focusing on my health. I’m donating to a lot of causes and will start donating to some local politicians. Thank you and keep on keepin’ on!

  • CraftyHope

    I haven’t said it yet, but I’m so very sorry about the loss of your aunt. But, congrats on that mortgage freedom. And finally, dang those student loans. I’ve still got mine too. Best of luck in conquering those for sure!!