Maybe I Need To Buy New Pens To Celebrate.

Everyone wishes they were a morning person like me because society is more designed for morning people. And I couldn’t agree more. Most of the time being a morning person works in my favor but SOMETIMES there are events – like screenings of running movies – that don’t end until 9pm and then you get home and it takes a while to wind down from the screening and it’s after 10pm until you can fall asleep BUT STILL YOUR BODY WAKES UP AT 3:15. So…Hello Tuesday! How does 5 hours of sleep sound?

(Tuesday responds: IT SOUNDS TERRIBLE. GO BACK TO BED YOU CRAZY PERSON.)

I do like that mornings are so easy for me. I do feel like it makes life easier most days. And this makes me feel bad for everyone else in the world who struggles with mornings. Like I’ve been given some sort of Homework pass the rest of the world didn’t get, so everyone else is complaining about the Homework and I’m just over here like, La, La, La…don’t look at me over here enjoying life with no homework!

I’ve actually kinda always liked homework, too. Not assignments, really. I never liked being told what to do. I never read assigned reading save for a few books for a few reasons. But I liked writing and paper, pens and other Office Supplies so a lot of types of homework I could kinda get into. And when I studied for exams, I always liked breaking it down into writing tasks. Like, re-writing all of my notes. Or outlining the chapters. Or something like that. I’m sure it’s my affinity for pen/paper, but either way, I liked a lot of tasks associated with homework – even if I hated being assigned it in principle.

SO! Imagine my excitement when I met with my therapist yesterday and:

  • She used my favorite pens
  • She referenced when her own Dad died
  • She said she used to be a long distance runner
  • SHE GAVE ME HOMEWORK.

Like…the GOOD kind of homework. The kind that requires reading a book with journaling questions! And taking notes! AND HIGHLIGHTING!

Add that to the fact that there’s a donut shop across the street and I’d say it’s an excellent fit. She wants me to try a group session specific for some of my issues with food but I’m not 100% sold on that. The one-on-one fit feels good but I don’t even know if I want to try a group session. It’s a $20 copay and I’d rather use that $20 and go to dinner with friends every other week. I have been thinking about that a lot. About how there are people in my life I just don’t see enough and how I wish I could share a meal with them to catch up or just visit. I don’t know. I’ve tried group therapy-type sessions before in relation to other issues and I always feel a little let down by it. BUT I NEVER FEEL LET DOWN BY DINNER WITH FRIENDS!

When she asked me to do some “journaling” in coordination with questions posed at the end of the chapter in this book I was all, “Um. Can I do it on my blog?” She says, “Yes. Send me a link when your done. I’ve had patients who blog through therapy before.”

SO THAT SHOULD BE INTERESTING! I’ll do my therapy homework on my blargh. I’m becoming that woman on the internet everyone makes fun of. Although, let’s be honest. I’ve kinda always been that person in some capacity. Why stop now?

10 Comments

  • Grace

    This is great news. I like that she said you could do your homework on your blog. When I asked one therapist if I could type instead of handwrite a journal, she said she preferred that I hand write because it would help me to think. Bah. My next therapist was a better fit.

    Also, I share your feelings on the efficacy (or not) of any type of group thing. I don’t like those at all.

    But then…. IT’S ALL ABOUT MEEEEEEE. Hee.

  • Roseann

    I have read your blog since the beginning. I’ve recently started therapy, with the thought that it doesn’t need to be a secret anymore, that I struggle with depression and anxiety. I applaud your effort to make this struggle real and personable.
    I do say, though, that maybe you need to check out at least one or two sessions of the group meeting. I feel the same way you do- UGH- people, but then at least you can say you tried it and it didn’t work, instead of just never trying it. I’ve found that medical professionals don’t really take the whole ” I wouldn’t like it, so I’m not doing it” thing well, so I make a very small effort to attend or do whatever it is they are talking about, and that way, I have ammunition for when they try to get me to go again.
    Passive aggressive, yes. But it avoids conflict, which to me, is the bigger win.
    Would you mind letting us know the book she recommended? I’m on a streak now of not being enrolled in classes and therefore am using this semester for self-improvement and growth and would love a book rec- especially one with journaling prompts. You can email me if you’d rather not share it publicly.

    I adore the steps you are taking, and look forward to going on this journey with you.

  • Lana

    Just started reading your blog last week … Your bullet journal brought me here..but your writing keeps me coming back and reading every word!
    I can totally relate to loving homework because of the writing! Haha 🙂 I re-wrote all my notes all the time!
    And you should get new pens for your new homework.. Preferably in nice colours 🙂

  • Kathryn

    I just wanted to second the comment asking for the book title; I think it would be something I would find useful, as well. And I wanted to add how happy I am for you that this woman seems to be such a great fit 🙂

  • aphrodite

    I’m so glad your therapist seems like a great fit and that you’re tackling this with joy and excitement! Wonderful news! You go, girl!!!

  • Karen

    Happy, happy, happy that you like your therapist! Also, I didn’t know you and I were so alike about homework and writing. And while I do not wake up quite as early as you, I have always been a morning person as well. I sometimes wish at least one of my kids was a morning person too.

    I tend to think trying a group would be a good thing. You may get some benefit, but if not, you can always stop. I’d hate to think you missed a potential good thing by skipping it altogether.