Teaser Video and Funny Tweets

WE MET OUR GOAL! Some time yesterday we crossed the $1500 mark for the Over The Edge campaign for the YMCA and 15 seconds later I started hyperventilating at the thought of rappelling down a 12-story building. (Dear Universe: Thank you for not giving Huntsville a downtown full of sky-scrapers.) I mean, seriously, every time I imagine walking down that building with 120 feet between me and the ground? I puke a little in my mouth.

And then I started freaking about Dance Walking. AAARRRGGGHHH. How do I put an embarrassment pillow on my face when I’m the one doing the thing that is embarrassing?

But last night I decided to do a little teaser before the Dance Walking extravaganza on Saturday. E filmed it and stayed up late editing it and putting on YouTube. He emailed me to say it would ready this morning and it hit me: I CAN NOT WATCH THAT VIDEO. If I watch that video my embarrassment will be so strong that there is no way I’ll do more this weekend. So! Here is the Dance Walking Teaser Video that I will not watch until AFTER we film the real one on Saturday. Deal?

That’s the warm-up. It took me awhile to get the hang of dancing without music. On Saturday…IT IS ON.


And while we’re talking about how awesome my kid is for helping me document this embarrassment (He struggled for quite a bit to get this video working right)…let’s discuss why we should all be following him on Twitter. I know that those of you who have been around here awhile feel like you’re following someone’s kid and that’s creepy. But listen, he is SEVENTEEN. He will be a legal adult in JANUARY. He will be going off to college in ONE YEAR. He is practically an adult. I no longer have a say in how he lives his life online, I just trust he takes the advice I’ve given him (“Don’t put anything on the internet you wouldn’t be comfortable with your grandmother seeing/read. Even if you think it’s private and she’ll never see it.”) and just stays away from Lindsay Lohan. And ya’ll – HE IS FUNNY.

So…in exchange for making him film and edit videos of his Mom embarrassing herself in public…I’m trying to solicit him a few more twitter followers. It’s the least I can do.

This Is Insight To Way More Than Just Our Accents.

This is hysterically ridiculous. I’ve been wanting to do the Accent Vlog thing for awhile and I finally did it tonight. But this is INSANE because it does way more than show you my accent, it shows you how INSANE WE ARE in my home. And in my brain. And how much I hate filming myself. And how giggly I am. Just watch.

P.S. I have no idea how to make or edit a video. I just used E’s webcam on is MacBook and have no idea how/way it’s shaky or if the sound is messed up. JUST GO WITH IT.

Kim’s Accent Vlog – THIS IS HIDEOUS from zoot on Vimeo.

Say the following words:
Aunt, route, wash, oil, theatre, iron, salmon, caramel, fire, water, sure, data, ruin, crayon, toilet, New Orleans, pecan, both, again, probably, spitting image, Alabama, lawyer, coupon, mayonnaise, syrup, pajamas, caught

And answer these questions:

What is it called when you throw toilet paper on a house?
What is the bug that curls into a ball when you touch it?
What is the bubbly carbonated drink called?
What do you call gym shoes?
What do you say to address a group of people?
What do you call the kind of spider that has an oval-shaped body and extremely long legs?
What do you call your grandparents?
What do you call the wheeled contraption in which you carry groceries at the supermarket?
What do you call it when rain falls while the sun is shining?
What is the thing you use to change the TV channel?

Okay – for BONUS material you get to see Nikki and Wesley in this one. Pay close attention to the giant forehead that keeps crossing the screen, that’s Wes. Also, notice how my husband TRIES to pretend like I am the ONLY PERSON IN THE WORLD to use the word “buggy.”


Crayon vs Crown from zoot on Vimeo.

My daughter started a conversation with me last night about the confusing nature of the two homonyms: Crayon and Crown. I pointed out that they are not – in fact – homonyms. That just because some of us say them the same way…that’s not exactly right. I then did what anyone would do and grabbed my phone to start the conversation over again.

This is all I’ve got for today. Because it makes me smile and I’m struggling this week. I’m worn out and binge eating and struggling to keep my spirits up on the anniversary week of Dad’s death. And this video makes me laugh because my kid…as different as she is from me in so many ways…is also JUST LIKE ME in many others. I love the say she tells stories…she has the same conversational narrative I do. And while there are days she makes me crazy with her antics…she also manages to bring smiles to my face when I need them most.

Funky Cold Medina

(I was going to title this blog entry “Funk” but then a certain song popped into my head and I wanted to make sure you were hearing the same thing I was.)

So…there’s a lot of stressers in my life right now. Stressers? Stressors? Stressars? Firefox has no suggestions and I’m too lazy to see whether or not I just made up a word. STRESSERS. It’s a word for now, okay?

There’s my Mom who is still in the hospital in Knoxville post-surgery. They removed the malignant tumor but had to take more than just a bit of her colon as it had grown outside the colon and into her bladder and reproductive organs. No biggie…just a longer recovery. But we still haven’t gotten the pathology back from the biopsies and tumor so we’re still waiting on any future treatment information. Waiting for pathology reports is the most annoying thing about medical situations because they always hold that vital information that will change the outlook of your immediate future. YET THEY TAKE FOREVER. Don’t let the medical dramas fool you, there is no magic room down the hall that allows you to immediately look at test results. Just like there’s probably no real CSI unit that can get DNA results back in four minutes.

There’s LilGirl, our alpha bitch in the family who has always had some cataracts in her eyes but now has one eyeball that is swollen because they think the cataract has caused glaucoma. She has to be taken to Birmingham today to see a specialist. MrZ has one day off between switching jobs (Look! Another stresser!) and he’ll be using it taking her on a road trip. She’s an old dog so I’m not sure what the options will be for her but she’s been going blind for awhile and is very pitiful now that she’s in pain. Last night she was scratching at the wall in the hallway trying to get into our bedroom. SO SAD.

Then there’s my damn allergies. While Knoxville definitely makes them worse, they are not easy to deal with here at home. Alavert does me okay for most of the day but, like last night, it seems to wear off a bit while I sleep. Damn you and your 18-hour effectiveness! I was up since about midnight sneezing. I’d show you the pile of tissues I accumulated by the couch but that might be gross. My eyes do better with eyedrops but I still have huge bags under them partnered with dark circles. My nose skin is raw and my throat is constantly tickled. Allergies and allergy medicines keep me in a fog anyway, add lack of sleep to all of that and I’m bound to be a huge MESS today.

In case you were wondering…those three paragraphs were me trying to gain a bit of sympathy from the interwebs because I am in SUCH A FUNK. I’m just down and grumpy and sad and tired and angry and frustrated and every other negative emotion you can think of. I’m trying my best to force some sun into my outlook as that has been part of my attempt handling my own anxiety: THINK POSITIVE. I feel like I’m doing better with that mentality, it kept me sane at the dealership yesterday when I was stuck with AndyZ for 2.5 hours. I actually handled that situation well considering a few months ago I would have lost it the second I realized they had NO changing table in the bathroom. (This place is BRAND NEW and NO ONE thought of that?) So…I did okay yesterday during a high-stress period of time. But in general? I’m just having trouble ditching the funk. I have met so many people who fight way grander stressers than mine with positive outlooks, and I would love to be like them someday. But obviously – by the gray cloud in my heart today? I’m not there yet.

So…I’m going to include a cute little video MrZ took of AndyZ the other night doing his version of a Jumping Jack. Every time I watch this I smile. I hope you do to.

And Then There Was That Time My Husband Tried To Murder Me…

Many moons ago I took this picture:

My life

That’s a picture of half of my walk-in closet collapsed to the ground. It was taken relatively soon after we bought our house and not much later…various other pieces started collapsing as well. Up until last month we had no more hanger space than the average NON-walk-in closet because so many of the other pieces had fallen off the wall or were simply too wobbly to use. This is why the closet renovation is a must before we sell the house. It’s currently useless.

One good thing it offered, however, was a room to get ready in when the other person was still sleeping. I don’t think I realized how much we used it for that until we no longer had it. We currently have everything from the closet spread across our bedroom and MrZ has the closet taped and covered in plastic for painting. Most mornings I get up first so I just try to grab what I need and get ready in the bathroom by the kitchen. MrZ tried a different technique this morning. He simply turned on the light in the bedroom at 4am while he gathered his things to go swimming. Since this is a very rude gesture when someone is still sleeping (4am!), he decided the best road to take to keep from waking me was to make me think he was trying to murder me in my sleep.

Well…I’m sure that’s not what he was thinking. But let me tell you: When I felt him place a pillow over my face? While I was in the unable-to-process-events-logically state of awareness? I totally had an adrenaline rush and the sudden horrific thought that, Oh no! He’s had enough me wearing my houseshoes all day! He’s trying to kill me! And that was officially the worst way I’ve every woken up from sleep in my entire life.

Also…this is how a very kind gesture can be interpreted as a homicidal one. In case you were ever wondering.

So, instead of doing the snarky My Family Sucks At Basic Household Chores type of entry, I’m going to do something a little less mean towards my husband. You know…just in case.

Blog Entry Option #2: Cute Video Of My Kids Getting Hopped Up On Cake Poppers

All About The Cake Poppers from zoot on Vimeo.

My kids were eating some cake poppers I made and I decided to interview them about it. I promise the smile my son gives you at the end of the video makes it all worth it.