Why I’ll Need 14 Boxes of Tissues During Tonight’s “Glee”

I read what Chris wrote at AlphaMom last week and nearly lost my shit. Yvonne is counting down the days left with her son at home. And every time she writes about it I lose it. LOSE IT.

I’ve entered that same phase and I have a year to go. Ever since the theatre/dance department announced next year’s musical (West Side Story) I’ve been a volcano of “Last Time” sobs. That will be E’s last musical! Because next year he will be a senior and I will die.

Then End.

And to make matters worse…my favorite tv show, Glee (I know! You think it sucks! I know it kinda sucks sometimes! But I still love it.) is sending off some of my favorite characters in graduation this year. And the preview for tonight’s episode has Burt, Kurt’s dad, getting emotional about not being ready for his son to leave. His son who he spent many years alone with being a single parent. DO YOU SEE THE CONNECTION?

Every time I watch that damn commercial I cry my eyes out.

Not only that…but tonight’s episode is the Whitney Houston tribute. I didn’t grow up very culturally aware. We didn’t watch a lot of TV, I didn’t buy a lot of music, and we didn’t see a lot of movies. I didn’t have any teen magazines with NKOTB pictures on my wall. There were a few things that were big in my life for various reasons. Dirty Dancing because – for years – that was the token slumber party movie. Ghost Busters because there was a VHS tape of it at the hospital where my Dad worked that they used to test the VCRs they were repairing. And the Whitney Houston album: Whitney Houston which my Dad had a copy of on cassette. I knew every word to “How Will I Know” and “Greatest Love Of All”. My Dad loved that cassette. Something he loses every right to argue in death, no matter how embarrassing he would find that I was proclaiming that to the world.

So…kids who sing and dance on stage in a graduation episode featuring the music that reminds me of my Dad. DO YOU SEE WHAT THIS IS A RECIPE FOR? Me…sobbing my eyes out for the entire hour. Hell, I was listening to Kurt singing I Have Nothing this weekend and couldn’t even finish it. I was choking up, looking for tissues, all while my husband shook his head in confusion obviously thinking: This is going to be a long year.

Because it is. Remember how that first year after Dad died everything reminded me of him and I wrote about missing him all the time? Well…multiply that by 14 thousand and this upcoming year is basically going to be 15 million blog entries about how E is graduating and I’m going to die of a broken heart when he leaves. Or maybe something a little less dramatic.

So…bring on the Glee graduation-centered episodes with the tearful goodbyes from the parents. It’s a good way to kick of the next year. You are more than welcome to take a break from this blog for a year. At least until May 24th, 2013 at 5:30. That’s when he graduates. I HAD TO WRITE IT ON MY CALENDAR ALREADY. After that point the topic will change to him leaving me for college which will be slight variation of the “My Baby Is Graduating!” emotional roller coaster so…I’d say you’re safe to return some time early 2014. By then I may have gotten my shit together.


16 thoughts on “Why I’ll Need 14 Boxes of Tissues During Tonight’s “Glee””

  1. I was fine with my baby graduating high school in June….until I read this post….no, NOT REALLY…my youngest is also graduating up to Middle School and, well, maybe I’ll wait until I read your recap before deciding whether I’m ready to watch it, like, 10 years from now, or not.

  2. ack. crying at work. must. not. cry. at. work.

    My older one will be a Senior in the fall. My little one will be starting middle school in the fall. Woe is me.

  3. Don’t be sad that he’s growing up. Be proud that you did such a damn fine job raising him that he’s graduating and going on to become a productive member of society.

  4. they graduate on leelo’s birthday! just realized that! weird! and now i’m dvr’ing glee tonight! :'(

    1. It just hit me this weekend that Wes will be graduating from preschool around the same time too! Usually theirs is on a Sunday. How weird is that? A preschool graduation and a high school graduation during the same week…

  5. Mine will be a senior this year too and I cry every time I think about it! How will I survive without him home every day???? UGH I am right there with you with my box of tissues!!!! <<<>>>

  6. I am sitting here listening to my son and his girlfriend talk and laugh in the kitchen. I am going to be broken hearted next year, no I’m not being dramatic. And it isn’t because I am sad he isgrowing up, I am sad that it happened so fast. That the book of his childhood has come to an end.

    I have just made myself cry.

  7. Ahhh…just reading the phrase “not being ready” for a child to leave chokes me up. Last year when we dropped my daughter off at college, as soon as I said good bye (fighting tears), I stumbled my way to the car and proceeded to SOB how I “wasn’t ready”. I think my husband heard me say a million times, “I’m not ready. I’m not ready. This can’t be!!” as we drove home. I’m still not ready a year later. And now she’ll be gone the whole summer at an internship. I’ll see her 10 days all summer long. I’m hysterical at the thought….

  8. ok, so your post made me cry, thinking about glee tonight made me cry, following the link to alphamom & reading that story made me cry…i need a break, girl! how am i supposed to get anything done at work today now???

    * sob *

  9. Am I going to have to stop reading your blog?? My son will be a junior next year, so I still have a year to go, but I really don’t want to cry EVERY DAY!!!

  10. HUGS! I know! Colleen is graduating June 3, and my Christopher (21, in special ed) is graduating June 5. I can’t believe it. I am already so sentimental about it all. Then I still have my 10 year old, but weren’t my older ones just 10? YESTERDAY? Holy cow . . .

  11. All of the growing up stuff is hard but my son is only 3.5 so I’m pretending that it is still a long ways away.

    BUT … I just finished watching the show. Sigh. I’m a total sucker for Klaine and they rocked that one. Darren some times chews the furniture a bit (and came close a couple of times in this one) but SWOON. My favorite TV romance of the moment

    1. I’m not sure what “chews the furniture” means but it doesn’t matter because I would never see it because I am so in love with Klaine that Darren and Chris Colfer do no wrong in my eyes ;) Great episode for Klaine! And while I’m biased and love everything about them…I still think they did a very good job showing that most conflict between couples is actually 2-sided with everyone sharing a little bit of the blame. Well done. SWOON.

      1. The chewing the furniture is about how Darren occasionally goes (to my eye) a little too far in the emoting (prime example was after was after West Side Story when he got sooooo weepy about Kurt being proud of him). After Darren did his actual stint on Broadway he seems to have settled back into Blain. He just seemed a little lost after he left Dalton. I keep rewatching the Klaine stuff … I loved this episode a lot.

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