My own worst enemy.

My rewardI hate folding laundry. There can be a load in the dryer all day and I’ll dread having to fold it ALL DAY. Every time I walk near the laundry room I think, I should fold that. But the other voice says, Nah. Maybe later. Of course, once I do it? I feel much better…but man do I put it off. Same with putting up clean dishes, putting up folded laundry, cleaning out my van, and taking showers. Small tasks that take no time but annoy the hell out of me.

But lately? I’ve had no choice. Now that I’m back at work my hours at home are limited so I can’t put tasks off as long as I used to. So now? If I have a moment? I just do it. And I feel so much better. I still want to put things off, but I know I can’t because I only have a small window of opportunity to get things done. In other words, I’ve not made any real mental progress in my procrastination, life just took away some of the time I usually use to procrastinate.

So, when I’m putting off something – whether it’s simple like fixing lunches, or difficult like getting out of bed for bootcamp – I try to just remind myself to JUST DO IT.

It’s kinda working. A little bit. I’ve gotten up for bootcamp successfully every day in the last 2 weeks. But every day – especially days after late nights – it’s a struggle. To just GET UP and GO TO BOOTCAMP. I play this game inside my head, like in the cartoons, where I argue with myself. Part of me says, “I don’t want to get out of bed” and then the angel on my shoulders says, “Just do it.” I have those conversations for 5-10 minutes at least. Sometimes longer, depending on how early I get up. Back and forth…NO! YES! NO! YES! Maybe? YES! Okay.

I guess I’m proud of myself. I knew sticking with bootcamp once I went back to work would be hard. On tough days before, I’d nap with the kids to get myself through the day. But now? I don’t have that luxury. It’s early mornings, late nights, and no napping. Which means that voice saying, “No! NO! DON’T GET UP!” is getting louder and louder.

But every time I do, I am glad.

Now, am I having any luck with the voice that makes me binge-eat at night? No. But I think I only have it in me to battle one big voice at a time. The little voices – the ones that want me to put of folding clothes or making lunches – those are easier beat down. But the one trying to get me to stay in bed? MAN. That beeyatch is stubborn. She’s like, “But it’s so warm! And you were dreaming about going to school at Hogwarts! Stay in bed!” I definitely can’t take on her AND the one who’s all, “Ice cream at 10pm sounds GREAT!” all in the same day. I’m only one person, you know.


6 thoughts on “My own worst enemy.”

  1. I dreamt that I was on a quiz show and Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry were on my team (I have no idea why but in my dream this was super exciting and that I had to tweet lots about this fact) Well I woke up and actually had to check my phone that it didn’t really happen (yes what a geek!!)

    Then I had to fight the gremlins – time to get out of bed and go to work – argh! Then again it could have been the 5am wake up call that my friend had to answer this morning as she was commuting down to the city for a meeting today.

    On the other hand how much better do you feel for getting out of bed and doing bootcamp?

  2. I will fold your laundry if you will mop my floors. I am not a “cleaner.” I like to see a neat house, but I can overlook dust, grimy floors, etc.

  3. I feel the same way about the laundry, I cannot bring myself to fold it. I have ended up buying a lot of clothes so I only do laundry every two weeks. I swear I am not super lazy, just when it comes to laundry. Ugh. It’s laundry time this weekend.

    Anyway, good for you for getting up for bootcamp! Good luck with the voices!

  4. I don’t mind laundry or dishes, but cleaning bathrooms and floors gets put off as long as possible.

    I still don’t know how you can get by on so little sleep. I don’t want to lecture but that is a part of good health too.

  5. I love folding laundry. Doing laundry is usually the first of the weekend chores I tackle. Perhaps it helps that my first job as a teenager was working at a laundramat. I like ironing, too — but I tend to let it pile up and do a bunch at once while watching TV, rather than do a few items at a time (which wastes energy heating up the iron).

    Apart from that, I’m just like you on the procrastination, and like Karen on the cleaning! Hate doing dishes (we don’t have a dishwasher), but my husband can’t stand to see the (rinsed) dirty dishes waiting on the sideboard, so he often jumps in. He’s the neatnik.

    I’m continually amazed at the 4am wake-up time! I can barely get up at 6, and sure will be glad when it starts getting light at that time in the morning. Getting up in the dark is hard!

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a little bit of everything.