And Then There Was That Time My Husband Tried To Murder Me…

Many moons ago I took this picture:

My life

That’s a picture of half of my walk-in closet collapsed to the ground. It was taken relatively soon after we bought our house and not much later…various other pieces started collapsing as well. Up until last month we had no more hanger space than the average NON-walk-in closet because so many of the other pieces had fallen off the wall or were simply too wobbly to use. This is why the closet renovation is a must before we sell the house. It’s currently useless.

One good thing it offered, however, was a room to get ready in when the other person was still sleeping. I don’t think I realized how much we used it for that until we no longer had it. We currently have everything from the closet spread across our bedroom and MrZ has the closet taped and covered in plastic for painting. Most mornings I get up first so I just try to grab what I need and get ready in the bathroom by the kitchen. MrZ tried a different technique this morning. He simply turned on the light in the bedroom at 4am while he gathered his things to go swimming. Since this is a very rude gesture when someone is still sleeping (4am!), he decided the best road to take to keep from waking me was to make me think he was trying to murder me in my sleep.

Well…I’m sure that’s not what he was thinking. But let me tell you: When I felt him place a pillow over my face? While I was in the unable-to-process-events-logically state of awareness? I totally had an adrenaline rush and the sudden horrific thought that, Oh no! He’s had enough me wearing my houseshoes all day! He’s trying to kill me! And that was officially the worst way I’ve every woken up from sleep in my entire life.

Also…this is how a very kind gesture can be interpreted as a homicidal one. In case you were ever wondering.

So, instead of doing the snarky My Family Sucks At Basic Household Chores type of entry, I’m going to do something a little less mean towards my husband. You know…just in case.

Blog Entry Option #2: Cute Video Of My Kids Getting Hopped Up On Cake Poppers

All About The Cake Poppers from zoot on Vimeo.

My kids were eating some cake poppers I made and I decided to interview them about it. I promise the smile my son gives you at the end of the video makes it all worth it.


12 thoughts on “And Then There Was That Time My Husband Tried To Murder Me…”

  1. Bwah! I can’t watch the video yet as I’m at work, but I can guarantee you I’m giggling thinking about *you* thinking your husband was trying to smother you. I’d have probably thought the same thing.

  2. Thank you for this… I needed to giggle first thing in the morning, and this did the trick. Also… you have ADORABLE kids!

  3. We use our closet as a dressing room too. I see houses with His n Hers closets and I die a little inside. That is my life’s dream – MY OWN CLOSET. That will be perfectly neat and organized.

  4. Hahahahahaha! Oh, I can’t stop giggling! That is such a cute/funny story. I needed that this morning, so thanks!

  5. Zoot, you are killing me this morning! Between the pillow smothering story and the cuteness of the video, I don’t know what to do with myself! Seriously cracking up about Mr. Z. and the pillow, but I must admit, that would be a terrifying way to wake up.

  6. Awww! Your kids are adorable!

    As for the pillow over the face? Girl, you in trouble!

    We need to renovate our closets, too. Reconfigure the space, since our crawlspace attic is basically useless to store things.

  7. I made some cake poppers here while back and got tired of coating them in chocolate about half way through the batch. I kept the rest in the freezer and a couple of days later, grabbed one to see if it was still good. It was wonderful.

  8. Where can I find good recipes for cake poppers? I’m having some ladies over for book club this weekend and would love to try to make them for a snack. Thanks!

  9. I thought this might make you laugh –

    My boyfriend has really bad night terrors. Almost every night. He dreams people are trying to kill him, or me. He’s thrown me out of bed to avoid the gunfire plenty of times, which is a horrible way to wake up. Worst, the time he launched himself full force on top of me (while I was fast asleep, dreaming of a peaceful cottage) on a scramble to get out of bed. My heart rate was soooo high for minutes after!

    So your story reminds me of the time we were at my Mum’s and he was sleeping on a couch in the living room that joins onto the kitchen. The dishwasher had finished so I was drying dishes in the kitchen, but he (sort of) woke up (he was having a night terror) while I was holding up a plate and drying it. “WHY ARE YOU HOLDING A GUN AT ME?” he asked, convinced I was trying to murder him.

    A couple of minutes later he had woken up but was still really grumpy. “I don’t know why you’d dry a dish in that fashion when it looks like you’re holding a gun.” Sigh.

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