Ladies and Gentlemen? We have stretch marks!

Well. I have stretch marks. WOO. Actually, I had quite a bit from my pregnancy with LilZ and I really don’t mind them at all. It’s funny, once they heal up, they are kinda pretty, in my eyes. They have a silverish tone that I think is just a shiney way of telling the world about my parenthood. I like them.

Now – I would have been happy to not have anyMORE though, that’s for sure. Oh well. You can’t gain this much weight and not get at least a few. At least they have good company.

One time (pre-MrZ) I was laying out by the pool, sort of flirting with some guy (shhh…I know!) and LilZ (who was 4 or 5 at the time) came out of the pool, came over to me, and started COUNTING my STRETCH MARKS. I was like, “Um..hee hee…how cute. But Momma would rather you NOT point those out, thanks!”

Kids. They make dating quite interesting.


6 thoughts on “Ladies and Gentlemen? We have stretch marks!”

  1. Oh God, that’s funny. Remember those Quaker Chewey granola bar commercials? (at a wedding, kid says, “My mom says she can’t believe you’re wearing white!” or at a family picnic, “The man in the store cut up all mom’s credit cards ysterday!”) Counting mom’s stretch marks in front of a hot guy definitely could have gotten LilZ on TV…

  2. I don’t understand why I DON’T have any stretch marks! I assumed they hadn’t come in yet because it wasn’t time, until a friend exclaimed in shock at the sight of them NOT being there. I dont’ get it – I got a few after I gained some weight when I quit smoking 5 years ago and I do actually have some NOW on my breasts, but not on my stomach. I don’t understand!

    Furthermore, stretch marks were the LEAST of my worries – I could care less if I get them. I am MUCH more worried about having a colicky baby or not being able to nurse or having post-partum depression! I would rather have the stretch marks!

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